I do not know how to feel about this.. I am so mixed up.

Ok, I have 2 SK - both boys, ages 10 & 12. I also have my bio daughter, age 8.

Two weeks ago there was an incident with SK10. He acted like a total pain in the ass all day long for our nanny. Was in time out probably 5 out of the 8 hours she had him. One of the things that got him in trouble was he and his brother were playing with a keyboard/piano that they gave to my daughter a year and a half ago and SK10 allegedly said "if dad and " " (stepmoms name) break up we are so taking this back from " " (my daughter) - she is so not ever playing with this again"... Luckily my daughter wasn't there when it was said - she was at a friends house.

Well.. here we are 2 weeks later. Get the SKids back on Sunday. At bedtime SK12 starts crying like a baby.. saying "I hate night time because I start to think about my mom dying when I'm at my dads".. DH and I calm him down and talk to him about controlling negative thoughts, focusing on positives, etc. I thought all of this was suspicious but filed it away in my brain and chalked it up to the readjustment phase of things.

Then, last night he pulls it again.. at bedtime - actually after bedtime. He got up out of bed and went downstairs to his dad and stated crying and saying he feels sooooo sad. Now my antennae is really up. I try talking to him matter of factly "do you miss/wanna call your mom".. no. "Do you not want to be here" No. I'm not babying him, I'm just calm and asking direct questions. I say we can't help him if he can't open up to us. His dad gets pissed and doesn't like my tone, so I leave and go upstairs. About 20 minutes later I hear SK12 crying still - and louder.

I walk into the living room and DH says SK12 has something he needs to tell you. I'm thinking "what now" (there is always drama with these kids).. SK12 cries "noooo I can't say it - I just can't"... I want to puke - he is so playing this up.

So DH tells me that SK12 told him he said the nasty piano thing and needed to get it off his chest.

Now at this point I am proud that he confessed, however, his manipulative, get everybody to feel soooo sorry for me, eat up 4 hours of the past 2 days with his crying and belaboring the point tactics start to overshadow the fact that he told the truth.

He does this crap all the time. You send him to his room for an early bedtime due to whatever and he will come out at 10:00 when the adults are trying to wind down and about to go to bed. He is in trouble but will say all sweetly "dad.. I need to talk to you" and then start crying about the divorce or whatever he thinks will get the focus off what he did and make daddy forget that his ass should be in bed.

The other sick part of this is right after the initial statement 2 weeks ago.. SK12 trash talked his brother for "saying such a mean horrible thing".. and all along he knew it was him. He let his brother get grounded, get in trouble, have me pissed at him and knew all along it was him that did it.

I'm hurt by all of this. DH is pissed at me because I walked out of the room and wouldn't talk to him about it. Hey, I was pissed and was in no frame of mind to baby him. I'm being told to let it go because he told the truth, but the whole thing makes me sick. From the initial malicious statement to the lies to the manipulation of when/how he fessed up.

I don't know what to do. I'm being told my feelings are wrong.