I hate what I've gotten myself into!!!
I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate being married to a divorced person with kids!!!!!! I'm so sick and tired of feeling like the awful new wife being treated like shit!!!! I hate how his ex can threaten, yell, name call, etc. And dh still protects and believes her stories. She's bad mouthed me so much their oldest is even acting coldly towards me and back talking. and yet I'm expected to be their baby sitter and when I complain I get an I don't know what to tell you or why do you have to be so hateful. I cant stand her calling him at least once a day for things unrelated to their kids. How am I the hateful one for just wanting her to leave us alone except for when it concerns the kids. Her problems are not his!!!!!!! I'm pretty sure I'm to the point if something bad happened to her I would not feel one drop of sadness for her but rather happiness that karma caught up to her. How can someone treat others so bad and feel no shame for their dishonest actions!?!?!?!? I always thought I could get along with anyone guess I was wrong I found the exception and I absolutely can not stand the sight of her wish she would just drop off the face of the earth with their bratty kids!!!!!!!!!!!
^^^^That^^^^ Brilliant
^^^^That^^^^
Brilliant reply, notasm. On point.
Husband problem for sure. And
Husband problem for sure. And don't believe him that he "doesn't know what to do" and "can't control what she does". If he trots out the old chestnut of "But she's the MOTHER of my CHILDREEEENNNNN" you might think about running. Or at least dragging him into a counselor who specializes in BOUNDARY SETTING.
My DH was wonderful at keeping as much BM drama out of our lives as possible.
Your poor thing! Develop
Your poor thing!
Develop your own life. Go out and take a class in ..something. Art, photography, cake decorating, join a gym. Do something that is entirely yours.
When he wants a sitter for his kids, so sad too bad. YOU. my dear, have plans. Remind him that they have a mother and you would NEVER want to replace her because that is very disrespectful. So let him deal with her while you do your own thing. If she needs a sitter tell DH that you have plans and he is welcome to watch his own kids. After all, they are his to love and take care of. :? }:) }:) }:)
In time he will have to run to catch up with you and your life or he will be left in the dust. The more I hear about these men the more I am sure that they don't want a new wife, they want a f*ckbuddy who does housework and can cook. These men are still so enmeshed in their exes lives they feed off each other. They cannot live without each other. These men should not be allowed to marry.
I'm babysitting them because
I'm babysitting them because I was the stupid fool that thought I could keep peace and be okay watching them as long as it meant I got to stay home with my babies. I can now see how wrong I was. I'm not even given a schedule of when the witch will pick their kids up and saying anything I get some lovely remark of cant you be nice or why do you have to be so hateful.
In the last month I have been taking my two and leaving it has helped a lot!!!! I just have to find a way to tolerate the week days.
I've tried setting boundaries
I've tried setting boundaries and all thats gotten me is them now going behind my back. She sends a can you call me message and if disappears. twenty minutes today!!!!!
If you could of written this. Is there hope or am I looking at a lifetime of heart ache and hurt?
Instead of being her victim
Instead of being her victim take her power and own her ass. Most of all since DH can't seem to keep his balls out of her purse, you take his balls and keep them firmly in a vice on how he will interface with her.
She gets shit for nothing other than whatever remains of his court ordered womb rental fees (CS). Including phone calls. If it is not kid related there is no conversation. PERIOD!!!!
If my X called for help if she was on fire I would not waste the effort to piss on her. For some reason many people have difficulty with clarity on the issue that all an X has is a person's past. An X should have only what is required to parent shared kids of a person's present and absolutely nothing of their future. Of course if the X can be reasonable then they can be worked with reasonably. If not, they do what they are told when they or told or they feel the pain.
Never should an X be tolerated to interfere in a marriage. PERIOD!!! For any reason.
Time to crank that vice and tighten up on DH's balls until he finds clarity.
I would not tolerate a person who is supposed to be my equity life partner abandoning the priority of me or the marriage for an X. Nope. Not happenin in my world.
Time to sit DH down, review the facts of the issues of his past behaviors regarding allowing XW/BM to interfere in your life and marriage and let him know that it is now over. If it happens again you are going to call a locksmith, rekey the locks, and he can go back and continue to pollute his gene pool with the shallow toxicity of her gene pool.
End of discussion.
DH acts, or you do and he won't like it.
Totally agree with rags WOW
Totally agree with rags
WOW that sucks. He shouldn't be doing this. Even my asshole DH doesn't tolerate a bad word spoken about me to his Exs. He would put them in their place quick smart.
The relationship that you DH has with his Ex needs to stop immediately. He needs to go to the shop and get a new phone number asap! like now.
Good luck