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His family still keeps his ex close

Crazymommaof4's picture

I have a question! I've been married twice both times my family had nothing to do with the Ex's not friends on Facebook no calling to chat nothing! It is totally different with my bf's family they all are friends on Facebook comment on her pics on how good she looks wishes her happy birthday ect. But they only do it with his second wife the one that's a total piece of shit! She don't even take care of their 6 yr old we do.they were only married 5 yrs the first one he was married 13 yrs but before you bash on him being married twice I was 12yrs then also 5 yrs the second time..... His family just irritates me cause they shit talk her then are buddy buddy and its not like they do it so they can see the child cause the mother don't have her... Is it normal to be that way or is my families way the unnormal it just makes me feel unwelcome even though we've been together 2yrs

godess-clueless's picture

I always refer to the backstabbing,[when they are not present] friendly to your face [when talking about someone else] as musical chairs. I saw alot of this with DH and his ex and daughters.

My only advice is totally stay out of it. FACEBOOK seems to reconnect and maintain many relationships that would otherwise have fizzled out long ago. I limit mine to only my sister and my daughters.

DH divorced his wife almost 35 years ago. For some reason she is on every past and present relatives friend list. Family members that never met her have her on their friend list. All the more reason for me not to accept the many friend requests from DH's family members.

I just stay out of it all. As far as I am concerned---What happens in my life or my own family'y lives stays private. I share very little negative things with DH to repeat.

Crazymommaof4's picture

Well I go to the family functions and wish I didn't have to! I'm plesent and if talked to I will talk but don't go out of my way for them at all!

smithsgirl's picture

If it's the ex wife that has custody of the kids you might find its simply to keep her sweet. They might feel that if they don't get in with her then they won't see the kids as much, especially if you don't have the kids as much as BM does. Unfortunately it seems that a child belongs more to the mother than the father, it always has done. For instance my partner's family aren't exactly the best of friends with BM but they make an effort with her as she's the one looking after her kids and also the times they want to see them is when they're under her care as they work all weekend when partner has them. Whereas BM's parents never speak to partner now even though they knew him for nearly 15 years. But why would they, it's their daughter that has the children they can see their grandchildren whenever they want.

Crazymommaof4's picture

See the daughter lives with us and has for almost 2 yrs. I'm the one taking care of her but yet I'm treated like crap.,. Hell I'd totally prefer the mother to have her and them go thru her that way I could have no contact with any of them