Here I am, in my room again...
Living room has been taken over by skids and napping DH. I put taco soup in the crock pot, started a load of laundry and retired to my room. On some level, I feel guilty. But, not on a level that I'm going to do anything about it. My bio kids have been sequestered to their rooms because 2 out of the 4 skids have strep, and I don't want it either. So here I shall stay. Until the crock pot dings and I get hungry.
I fight the internal battle of selfish vs sanity/well being. I hate that I even have to fight this battle. But, here I sit. Fighting it anyway. And wondering which side is going to win. If selfish, I will go and try to ingratiate myself into the messed up dynamic. If sanity, I will no doubt have to listen to DH tell me he needs my help and he doesn't want to/shouldn't have to do it by himself.
God bless it, I love him. He's perfect for me, but when his skids are here, he's a different person and I can't believe I didn't see it before. I've known him for 24 years. How the hell did I miss it???
Tell him you are taking your
Tell him you are taking your kids ou tto help you grocery shop then drag it out for as long as possible. Before BS, I would leave DH home with SS and I would just go walk around the mall then hit the grocery store on my way home for whatever few items I initially needed. I love getting lost in Target. It will get both you and your kids out and doing something. The mall near us decorates for the holiday seasons, maybe yours does too and you can go get some pictures of your kids or just go walk around and enjoy the weather.
Unfortunately
We live in a town of fewer than 8000 people and the nearest mall is 120 miles away. The nearest WalMart 54 miles and across 2 state lines. Options are VERY limited here.
Wait - he shouldn’t have to
Wait - he shouldn’t have to do it by himself?! I don't believe you popped out those FOUR skids. *shudder*
He is not perfect for you if you can’t stand your life half the time.
Welcome to the site. I used
Welcome to the site. I used to do like you do - ie hide in my room a lot when the SKIDs were here EOW. But eventually got fed up with that, and figured that I have a right to be in my own house which I was helping pay for! I wished I had got to that point a lot sooner. And I have a lot of anger that my DH used to sacrifice MY wellbeing in favour of his daughters'. If I had it to do over I would do it so different. But at least I had no illusions that my DH was in some way my perfect partner.
Yours is not "perfect for you" if your life is so crummy when the SKIDs are there that you have to hide out in your room, because "he's a different person" when they're at your house.