Getting BM to Pay Her Share - Update
Wow BM is crazy and not too smart. Last night she called again and got heated about us "bullying" her into agreeing to pay for copays and prescriptions while we pay premiums and deductibles to cover the skids under my insurance. She kept arguing that the judge would make a decision and that she'd be serving us with court papers tonight for the insurance issue. Hello moron - the judge can't order ME to do anything! I let her know under no uncertain terms that if she did that, I would rescind my offer and her and DH would need to provide them with insurance,which will cost more for everyone involved.
It really will be best for the skids to be on my insurance and not Medical (which was her back up option) because my insurance is so good. DH and I wrote BM a follow up email that broke down all the reasons that our offer was reasonable and in the kids best interest, not to mention BMs. I let her know that it did not benefit me in any way to insure them and that I would rescind the application for coverage if we were served with anything related to my insurance, she got heated on the phone again, or we couldn't agree by Sunday night.
I also let her know that I would keep the skids insured no matter what happens between her and us, except her failure to pay the agreed amounts - I let her know that the insurance would be cancelled immediately if she failed to pay or gave me a hard time about it and that my HR had concurred I could do that at any time.
We'll see how this goes....
I really considered doing
I really considered doing that last night, but BM's back up plan was to have no insurance for them at all for 3 months so that she could get them on Medi-cal. Honestly, we think she has already cancelled their insurance through her employer. That seems way more risky to me - if something happened to them, they would have a hard time getting coverage and it could financially break my DH.
Besides SS12 really does need braces and there is no way he is getting them without my insurance, which covers half. I remember having a similar BM (broke and not working) when I was a kid and being embarrased because I needed braces and couldn't get them. SD17 is a really great kid and I want to give her coverage now and when she goes to college this year.
I will password protect my insurance account before she gets the cards and if she plays ANY games, I will give her one notice and then the insurance is cancelled. Except for SD17 who will be 18 in June and I can totally trust.
Yep - seems to work well
Yep - seems to work well doesnt it? She is serving us tonight with some papers related to support so we told her that we'd include the insurance agreement in our response. The response will also note that she is no longer going to need to pay $600 a month for insurance so CS should be reviewed again. She isn't going to like that so I'll hold onto the cards until DH calls her and reminds her that neither party is going to like what the other has to say, but we need to agree on the insurance issue to benefit everyone, and if she opens her big trap in court and requests anything other than what we agreed on, I'll be cancelling insurance immediately and she will be back in court with DH to figure out how they will provide insurance for the kids.