Feels like I'm always the bad guy
Just a quick little background, my husband and I have been together for 14yrs and married 13yrs. He has not got along with his ex-wife or her family since they have divorced. Ex-wife started doing drugs, became a herion addict, they have 4 kids together, their youngest is now 17. Her family has hated my husband since I have been with him, always blaming him for his ex-wifes actions. They all go as far as putting stuff in his kid's heads all these years as well. When my husband and I first got married his ex-wife would call all hours of the night, she would call his work saying she was his wife and still trying to hang out with his family. My step kids don't see my kids and I as their dads family, or theirs. Bottom line is I have been through quite an ordeal these past 14years. I have an okay relationship with my two younger SS but the two older not so great. They treat their dad like crap, even though he has been the one that has been there for them since I've been with him and we are the ones who provided but he is still the enemy. Well their grandma passed away yesterday. He called his kids let them know how sorry he was and that he is there if they need to talk. Well their moms aunt called my husband the day before the grandma passed away crying to him and saying that he is still part of the family and that their mom wanted to make amends with him. Okay, I was okay with him going to see the grandma before she passed, however his ex-mother in law was not in a hospital but at his ex-wifes house. I also do have an issue with that family calling my husband crying to him now, wanting him to be there when all they have done is cause issues. So when his ex-sister in law called I heard him on the phone, when he hung up he did not say one word to me about that call. I waited about 30min and then asked him who called and what did they want. He got defensive and told me that I could clearly hear the conversation and why did he need to repeat what was said. Well I did hear a womans voice, who I assumed was his ex-wife and I could not clearly hear what was being said, I could hear crying. He then proceeded to make it my fault and we were now arguing because of me. No, all I wanted was to know what the phone call was about, it just seems like its always a secret when it comes to his former family and I have no right to ask questions. I guess, I need to know if I am in the wrong here and what exactly is my place here?