Dealing with the ex & family functions
My ex's mother did not approve of his divorce or our getting together. Basically because we had an affair. I think if we had met after our divorces were final it would have been very different.
Anyhow, the woman has never spoken to me in the 6 years that we have been together. Several of his brothers and sisters feel the same way that she does. I need to add, that they are strict Catholics.
We were recently at a family party/graduation together, and it went ok. Everyone was respectful, not overly friendly, and we kind of all stayed on our own sides.
This past week, my ex's mother had a massive stroke. She lives in another state, about 8 hours away. So do 4 of my ex's brothers and sisters and their families. I opted to not travel with my ex, because I felt it was too stressful of a time for the whole family to add anymore awkwardness to the situation.
Even worse, is the fact the the Ex will not stay out of ANY of HIS family functions, parties, etc. ...and you betcha, she travelled right down to visit his mother. She took 3 of their 4 chidren with her. My fiance took his oldest son with him a few hours later.
So here I am feeling lonely, sad, jealous, angry etc. I had to watch my fiance packing his camcorder and fireworks, as he was planning on staying through July 4th. All that this did, was make me picture him with everyone having a family picnic, Ex and all.
I do not plan on being absent for all family functions. I will not allow that to happen. They need to "expect" me to be present. I just didn't feel like it was appropriate this time. But now I'm not sure.
I have no idea if I am doing the right thing by not going. I don't know how to cope with all these feelings I have either.
Any ideas, thoughts, suggestions are welcome.