Can he get more custody and CS question..
So here's the story in a nutshell; (long)
ex wife cheated, DH was in a bad place and pretty much gave her whatever she wanted. They wrote up a separation agreement and when they divorced it was filed with the court so there's a legal doc but it's not a court order.
he has 20% but wanted more time but she convinced him since he works full time and she was a SAHM that they should be with her mostly but that he could see the kids whenever he wanted. He wanted 50% but he coward to her. CS was based off of her making zero money as well.
fast forward: she has given him his measly 20% however, she tries to insert herself and/or schedule numerous sports so she has access to the kids. She also refuses to let him have any extra time at all and says no all the time. She involves the kids in every conversation for instance she will ask them if they want to do all these sports (without dad's agreement which she is suppose to do per their agreement) or go skiing (during DH's time) with her and she gets them all excited then she tells DH "the boys want to do this or that" then if he says no because we can't fit the boys doing 6 sports between them in a single weekend or he wants to be with the boys during his scheduled time she tells the boys "sorry... dad said no. I'm so sorry" then when he didn't take them to the things she scheduled (for instance we had youngest's birtgday party planned for Sat afternoon and he had a basketball game that dad didn't agree to basketball sign ups) she screamed at him in front of the kids then told him his lack of support is an embarrassment to their family. (DH did agree to the kids doing one sport per season and he's also coaching for that sport. He supports the boys in everything, but he feels it's overload and she is doing it to hurt his time with the kids) it's been particularly bad lately because he has told her numerous times that he supports what they agreed to but he will not pay fir or take them to things that she unilaterally made a decision on for his time. Her argument is it's their time and the kids should be able to do absolutely whatever they want to do on their time. His argument is it's not healthy to do more then one sport per season and doing so could cause injury (we have got several professional opinions about this) They also are so over scheduled that they do not have time to do their responsibilities here like homework and caring for their pets. Nor do they have time to just hang out with friends, relax or spend time together as a family (which is exactly what she wants) the other things is she's making a lot of money now. Like a lot. She got into real estate and making a killing. We know this because I also have my real estate license and it's very easy to see what other agents have sold. However, she still expects his full child support which he pays every month and has never ever missed a payment. He also agreed to pay 100% of everything on top of that like extra curricular activities and medical. She has been paying for those things though (but we still pay medical insurance. She's been paying co fees) and has not asked for reimbursement. That might be how she is covering herself for that. There's a lot more but that's the gist of it. So, he's in the position to be able to take on more custody. She will definitely refuse and she will definitely tell the boys he's trying to take them away from their mother. That's what she does. Her mother is just as bad and the two of them do very petty things to him constantly and it's just terrible. So, we know we obviously have to go to court but is there anything he can do about the child support now? Also, because they don't have a court order, what does he need to do to get CS recalculated?
As far as custody, he's worried she will paint this picture of him being an unsupportive dad not taking them to every activity they want to do even though he does take them to the agreed upon ones and is fully engaged in those even coaches. She has beat him down so much he's actually scared the judge will see things her way and she will get full legal custody. She's made all educational and medical decisions because she was the SAHM and he trusted her to do so. I told him he has shot himself in the foot with many things but what does he need to do now? What are next steps?? Thanks!