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Being stuck with HIS ex-wife and her family and Thanksgiving night!?!?

RLZ0073's picture

Again they're pulling this shit! I'm forced to go over to his ex-wife's (and douche-tasting boyfriend) house on Thanksgiving night to have dessert so my H can hang out with them and her dad because, 'he filled in when my own dad died'?!?

WTF?!? No one gives a fuck that all these prople don't mean SHIT to me and there's a mother friggen reason why they're all in the past and she's the ex?!?

I'm just sitting here crying and I'm just done with having to be the third wheel in this life.

My Ex and I barely communicated when we got divorced and our kid was 15 and still don't. Why is there constant chatter and why do we have to hang out with these people who are strangers to me?

No one cares how I feel. EXES ARE EXES FOR A REASON.

RLZ0073's picture

He's like you know... she lost her dad around Thanksgiving. Like I'm supposed to pity her... her dad died when she was in her 40's
 

im like yeah, my dad died at 2:15am the morning after Thanksgiving when I was a 14 year old kid. My dad never got to see me graduate high school let alone college, hold the only child I had let alone all his other grandkids. The only good thing is he didn't see me fail by marrying 2 assholes now.

the sad thing is he is defending her when I stated that my dad died practically on Thanksgiving and maybe she'd have some compassion when this is not all about pitying her!!!

Why is he defending the EX?!? I don't think he was ever ready to move on and I made a big mistake. I think after the kids are gone he'll still be more into the ex than me.

i can't handle all this anymore. There were times I wished for a heart attack when I was single and alone. It's pathetic that I'm wishing again for that now, when I'm surrounded by people.

why am I surrounded by jerks? Do some people just attract assholes?

 

hereiam's picture

so my H can hang out with them and her dad because, 'he filled in when my own dad died'?!?

He's like you know... she lost her dad around Thanksgiving.

I'm confused. I thought he was going over there so that he could hang out with her dad.

RLZ0073's picture

Best friend. So her stepdad. Sorry I did not clarify that.

I only know this person. He's a nice guy but there's no reason for me to hang out with these people. It's his past and even more so when these kids turn 18. I'm sure his ex's mom and stepdad know that she getting way too much CS for what she does for these kids. $2k a month... ridiculous.

and anytime she calls, he's there to answer the phone. its sad I've been married to him for 1.5 years and stuck with him for 3 and I want one of us to go away for good and I miss my single lady house and am thrilled every time he's not here because he's on business.

notsurehowtodeal's picture

Don't go. You said you were being forced. You are a grown up adult woman - how are you being forced? You are not telling your husband not to go, you are simply refusing to go yourself. I am sure there will be blow-back, but stand your ground and don't go. Spend the time figuring out how to get out of this marriage.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

You are not his property. You have autonomy and agency and the ability to say "No thanks, that doesn't work for me so I'm going to do X instead".

Stop giving this guy so much power over your life and your emotions.

WarMachine13's picture

How is he FORCING you??

You're an adult. You have free will. Let him go and you move out while he's gone. 

Winterglow's picture

Do.Not.Go.

Spend the evening surfing for a new place to live... alone. Make copies of all important documents (bank statements, insurance papers, invoices for furniture, retirement plans, etc.) and stash them somewhere else, somewhere your husband won't find them by accident (with your parents? Sibling? Friend? At work? PO box?). Separate all finances and get your name off of  ALL credit cards you share with him (you don't want him to run up a ton of debt out of spite). Then move out to your new place. You don't have to go all out for divorce if you don't feel ready but maybe the shock of seeing you leave will bring him to his senses.