Annnnd another one..
Sorry! I never have this much free time and so now I'm bombarding all u guys. It will stop, I promise haha.
(My girls are with their dad and baby is with gma and gpa and house is clean.i guarantee this won't ever happen again )
You guys are very knowledgeable and provide some great ideas that I wouldn't have otherwise thought of myself.
We are quite happy with our family and schedule, but now I'm wondering if I should change it.
My girls come home on Sunday's at 4 pm. Stay until their dad picks them up the following Sunday at 4 pm.
SD comes EOW, and we purposely set it where she's here on the weekends my girls are home. They all truly love eachother and honestly I have more probs with sibling rivalry between the oldest ones than with the youngest girl. We all look forward to SD coming, we plan our big outings for those weekends (if we are blowing cash- might as well treat them all!) they all get to be together and they all love it.
It's clear to me that SD is feeling insecure about her dad. (Some actions and her words) it's surprising to me that we didn't deal with ANY of that before the baby came. But- ok. And it didn't even really start after baby was born- it started when he was about 6 months old. Anyway regardless of why, this is how she feels.
My ex and I are friendly and flexible. It would be very easy to switch the weeks so that sd comes when no other kids are here (except baby ofc) so she can have almost all of dads attn. let me mention a few things first/
Because of 2 planned trips with their dad, we have had 2 weekends in the last 2 years where my girls weren't home. Sd came. She was SO upset that they weren't here and bored out of her mind. Yes of course DH played with her and took her out visiting family etc but she still wasn't happy. She missed her sisters!
I want to take everyone's feelings into account. Before anyone jumps all over me, I want to make it clear that ALL THE KIDS COME FIRST!
So pros for changing weekends: Sd gets more one on one time with dad, baby and I.
Only two kids to manage on that weekend.
That's all I can think of but that doesn't mean there aren't more!
The girls will never see eachother and be together causing great sadness
DH and I lose our almost kid free weekend (we usually send baby with gma and gpa for a night so we can just hang out together).
There isn't that feeling of "big happy family" and togetherness.
Baby as he ages won't have any memories of being with all his sisters at the same time, which even now at almost 9 mosnold he loves when they are all here and play with him.
I'm not convinced it the best thing for SD, or the others.
Thoughts? And please be nice. I'm having a wonderful day and just looking for ways to better and strengthen our family and attending everyone's needs.
And for the record, DH is 100% against switching the weeks!