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I want my own bio-child so bad

Lavendarlulu's picture

I know that the saying is the grass is always greener on the other side. DH and I lost a 7 week child years before we got married. He has my SD fulltime and he is creating a spoiled monster with her. Although he has had her since she was 1, he seems to feel guilty and sorry for her. ..I guess because of the kind of mother she has. DH calls me her mother and I know that SD and I neither one of us like it. There is so much stress in our lives and we are both busy fulltime workers barely making ends meet and we don't have sex. I'm in my early thirtys and my clock is ticking. DH is 18 years older than me. I just don't see how could a women give up her own child...that looks just like her? I would give anything right now to have my own baby. I hate that SD has the best of my DH and myself. I bought a cute baby bib one night and she almost had a breakdown in the store. Smile I wish it was for my baby. This life is very hard. Any advice would help.

:sick:

ClutterMusings's picture

I felt the same way. Even though things were tough as a step parent. I have my bio daughter now and am IN LOOOOOOVE! It's true what you hear though. Marriage and being a step-parent gets EVEN harder, near impossible. If you think for a second that having your own bio child with this man and scenerio would make him "appreciate you more" or make you feel more a "family" forget it, girl! That does NOT...I repeat DOES NOT happen.

Well, it sure didn't for me.

But, I wouldn't trade my baby for anything in the world.

This is such a tough topic for me so excuse my rant. I have so much chaos on the inside I don't know how to get it all out!

My advice though. think LONG and HARD about this!

blayze's picture

I don't have the words to say...but I do know how hard it is to not be able to have a child when you really want one. Big hugs to you!!! I hope you get your wish soon.

z3girl's picture

Having my own child personally helped me not care so much about my SD, but she also didn't live with us.

Like others said, if your DH doesn't want a child and you do, move on now while you still have time.

Lavendarlulu's picture

LOL that is pretty funny I mean even my MIL said he is turning her into a monster. She is spoiled by him & she gets the lying manipulative part from crazy BM. BM has lied like she has cancer for 9 years.

StepmomGina's picture

You might love this man, but if he's not a good dad and not a good husband, then why tie yourself to him with a baby? You really want to have a baby of your own, but you're not even having sex and your time is running out. Get out while you can, don't waste another minute, time is precious and waits for no one. It will take a few years to find someone else to start a family with, so get going now. You do not want to live with the regret of not having your own children when that's what you wanted. Besides, new problems may arise when you have a baby with your husband... like what if his kid is jealous of the baby so he spends more time with his first kid to make her feel better and leaves you to handle the baby.