Why would you doubt that you are good enough for them?  The question is, are they good enough for you?

You may want to seriously consider leaving them.  Not particularly because of SS but because your SO does not respect you one bit. He is gaslighting you with his "he says that I am not "emotionally mature" because he has been through shit and I haven't. He has mentioned that I don't get where he is coming from (and it's true, I don't!) but I ask him to help me understand. " shit.  

This man is not worthy of you and is far from being equity life partner material for you.  Do not waste your life on this prick or sacrifice your life on the alter of SParental martyrdome to try to save this little boy from his shallow and polluted gene pool.  Sadly this kids entire gene pool is shallow and polluted unlike many kids in the blended family world who are reasonably blessed with only half their gene pool being shallow and polluted. BM is supposedly whispering evil manipulative crap in this little boy's ear and your SO is a gaslighting whiney asshole.  This poor kid is doomed.

As for the little boy not liking you.  2yos can be fickle little turds.  For some reason my eldest nephew did not like my bride when he was a toddler. He was very vocal about it.  Then... as time went by he has become very devoted to his Aunt.  He is 21 and she is one of his favorite people. They are very close.

Take care of you.  Move on. Put this guy and his baggage fading in your rear view mirror.  When you least expect it you will find a person of quality to be your true equity life partner and together you will make a life, have a family, and be happy. 

Be happy even while this new life journey unfolds.

Why are you so involved and trying to play house with this guy only six months into the relationship? At six months, you should be considering meeting the child ONLY IF the relationship is meeting both people's needs, which is not the case here because you're having a hard time getting a date night (very basic) and meanwhile tying yourself in knots trying to please this guy who should be handling his own baggage (child). You either have very low self esteem or this isn't a real post and it's made up to get everyone in a frenzy. Assuming this is real, break it off and get some help. 

It's really admirable you're trying so hard but maybe that's the problem... A 2 Yr old is incapable of hating you, maybe youre coming on too strong, they'd be very attached to their mother or father and you are still relatively new. My advice would be don't force yourself upon them let them come to you 

Your problem isn't with the toddler. Toddlers are creatures that can be adorable one minute and horrible the next. When my son was a little older than that he used to regularly tell me that I was 'fired'. "You're fired mommy. You're not my mommy anymore." Yeah, ok - fine give me my severance!! He stopped after he came around after half an hour or so and said "You're not fired anymore." I told him that was too bad because I'd already arranged to go to another family and they were very excited about having me. His little face... 

Anyway, kids that age really don't have any clue what impact their behaviour has on you. So just take it easy...if you decide to stick around. 

Your problem here is that your very reasonable request of going out when the kid isn't there and some reciprocal emotional support isn't being met. That's a bare minimum for a relationship. I'm not blaming because I put up with a lot worse for a lot longer with my ex. But I shouldn't have. And neither should you. 

OP, take a step back and breathe.  You want a 2-year-old to meet YOUR needs, and you are taking it personally when he doesn't.  Toddlers have discovered their personal power and they use it fiercely, and it has nothing to do with him HATING you.  Your need to "shower him with love" is YOUR need, not his.  Keep an eye on his needs, which are, right now, to be able to explore the world and still have safe adults to support him, even if he acts mean to them.  He doesn't need to have adults who want him to take care of their feelings and need to be loved. 

You sound overly anxious to be in a wife/mother role, for all the wrong reasons. 

Don't stay with a man who won't even take you on dates a mere six months into the relationship. He's just not into you if that's the case.

I have read books and blogs on how to raise a 2 year old.

Darlin’ you’ve been with this guy for a short 6 months and you’re already doing research on “raising” a 2 year old. This is not a task you should be taking on and honestly this role is for both the child’s father and BM, not you. You are trying too hard to be/feel loved and wanted by them.

Am I good enough for these guys? Should I leave? I want to do whatever is best for my boyfriend and his son. I understand that I don't have experience with raising a child on my own. So please just give it to my straight. 

You are questioning if you’re good enough for SO and his son. Please question why you think so low of yourself that you are willing to do anything and everything to have them accept and love you. You want to do what is best for them but losing yourself, your wants & needs in the process will not benefit you. Don’t do the mistake that so many do of completely consuming themselves in “helping” them that you end up drained and empty with no more to give. Being with a man with a child is not a relationship that you should be in right now. Your SO has a lot of maturing to do himself and you deserve someone who will compliment you and not disregard your feelings.

You sound young... you sound like you have some unrealistic and idealistic thoughts about you, your BF and his son making up a neat little "happy family".  You jumped in quick and with everything you had.  Your BF must have loved that you took on a lot of his responsibilities.. but IMHO you moved really fast and had unrealistic expectations that because you wanted it to work. ..it would magically just "work".

Your BF also sounds a bit self centered.. only his struggles are "real".. you are just immature (in his eyes).

It is only 6 months in.. you should obviously NOT be living with this guy yet.  He should still be in the FULL ON chase and wooing portion of your relationship. 

If you want to try to make this work.. step way back.. make this guy DATE you.  Don't live with him.  Let the relationship with him and his son grow organically.

From your profile:

"I love my boyfriend and more than anything I want to be what they need."

What?

Learn to love yourself first, then find someone with whom you can have a give and take, complementary relationship with.

It doesn't sound like either one of you are ready for a relationship, right now.

They are used to me and hubby so if any other person so much as comes close to them or touch them then they will cry and scream. They aren’t used to them yet.

even with my in laws its the same thing but the only difference is that they will still spend time, try to give my kid snacks etc or feed them and eventually they will warm out. Even my sil coaxed my 3 yr old to go shopping with them and hubby had to rush to get her because she needed her diaper changed and my inlaws don’t realise if they did bring my daughter she would be shopping in the store too taking things off the shelves and putting it into a basket.

try coaxing the kid with his snacks and maybe sing a song or play peek a boo. It may take a while but then they will get that you are a friendly person

i doubt that a 2 yr old understands any poisonous crap the bio mum is telling him, their vocabulary is still kind of limited then and develops more at 3-4yrs old.

my kids love playing perk a boo or just shouting raaarrrrrr like a dinosaur. Be creative but just remember by age 1, a kid knows who their family or familiar faces are so they will have separation anxiety with strangers at that point and it will take time

Wait - he has "been through things and you haven't" because you don't have kids and have never had a child custody battle?  There is nothiing else of any importance in the world than that?  Really???  What a completely self-centered asswipe!  Sorry.  I get that you are very attached to him but that is without a doubt the stupidest thing I have ever heard.  People deal with  serious life and death issues every day that have absolutely nothing to do with divorce, children, or custody and they are every bit as important as what is happening in his little corner of the world.   Wow......  I would get used to not having your needs even recognized, let alone met, if you continue on this path.