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Don’t know what to believe

lilnik99's picture

My wife has a 13 year old son who does not live with us. He lives with his Dad in another state. This kid is rude, disrespectful, mean, manipulates, and lies a lot! We recently went back to our home state and she has been visiting with him. I keep my distance from the kids because he legit tried to fight me for no reason. Like no reason at all but for the fact I exist in his moms life and derail his dream of his parents reuniting. Anyways, she found some bruises on him and now he stating that he gets bullied in school and his Dad is abusive. Now, most kids I would believe this but with him.. I don't know. It's kind of hard. He is usually the aggressor and to my knowledge (from his mom) his dad has never laid hands on him or his brother. The younger one is with us. So now he is abusive. I don't know. Not saying it can't happen but it's kind of out of nowhere. The bullying at school. I'm having a hard time believing that is the entire story. I believe his mouth is writing checks that his hands can't cash. He's not a timid kid at all. He's done and said things to my wife that is out of pocket to the fact she was crying to me about how she loves him but doesn't really like him. He's been hurtful, deceitful, just downright nasty. But I know as a mother you see your child hurt, you run to the rescue. I'm just skeptical. You show me who you are and I believe it. I feel like he is just trying to play the sympathy card. I know kids get bullied and don't always say stuff about it but I also know you can hear a difference in them. He still calls and acts the same. No change. Could be a front but it's hard to believe. I'm being supportive but the side eye is still there. 

Rags's picture

Next time, i hope the beating comes with some notable stitches.

As a kid who was targeted by  bullies and finally learned that if getting hit hurts, and it does, then the one hitting me was going to suffer some injuries requiring reconstructive facial surgery.  One incident per new school sending the first  bully who tried me to the hospital is all it took to not be bullied... until the next new school.

The sooner a bully runs into someone not willing to tolerate their crap and who responds with overwhelming violence, the better IMHO.

Point this out to mommy when her historic bully but now bruised baby boy starts crying about being bullied.

And... cameras in the home. Next time he attacks you, defend yourself, hog tie his ass and call the police. Let mommy and daddy deal with their idiot child.

I would.

Missingme's picture

What's the younger one like? Do you get along? Do he and his brother? Have you and your wife talked with the ex about the problems or is that too estranged?