YSD is a Sneaky One
So after my last post about YSD's true colours coming out/the video call with her & SGD and DH & I where she made sure that she and SGD treated me like garbage and didsn't exist, then she immediately starts behaving differently and kissing my butt
First she sends a happy lovely response to my birthday post on FB for DH - something YSD never does. Usually she ignores everything I post although she responds to absolutely everyone else including members of my own family that she's friends with on FB
On the rare occasion SD has ever commented on anyting I've posted I've always followed up with saying someting sweet to her, "sweetheart", "sweetie", hearts, kisses etc...
This time i didn't respond to her. I simply liked her comment to acknowledge it but nothing more.
She then sent me a website page from her work which she wanted me to like, I ignored it
But this morning the big surprise, I get out of the shower and see she had tried to video call me over FB
I thought that was interesting but had no intention of having any more conversations with her, so I sent her a message saying it looked like I had missed a call from her and was everything okay
She says that they just wanted to wish me Happy Easter and that SGD had been wearing one of the dresses that I bought her
I wish them Happy Easter and say that I was sorry I missed that
Then she calls us back (DH had left an Easter voicemail for them)
So DH takes the call and puts her on speaker so we can all talk, DH already knew I wasn't pleased with her and woldn't be saying anything more than the briefest of pleasentries
Well, the first thing we hear is SGD saying "Hi Grandma!!" (nothing to DH)
I say hello sweetheart, how are you, etc. etc..
Then after a bit of chit chat with her and DH, YSD says how she tried to video us earlier because SGD had on one of the dresses from me but that, well, SGD doesn't really like to wear dresses like that
Before they hung up I noticed that SGD said "I love you Poppa" "I love you Grandma Disillusioned"
So, they hang up and DH indicates that he thinks YSD was just trying to fix things, that she hadn't intentionally meant any harm last time they called
Ya, right. Good one DH
What I think is that YSD knew after she pulled that crap that she had messed up.
She knows from past episodes, mostly when she was younger, that when she treated me like garbage suddenly some of the lovely things she took for granted that I did for her - trips to the spa, fun trips away, having all her favorite meals cooked when she was with us, thoughtful and fun actitivties as a step-family, etc...(believe me I did a lot for those girls) came to an abrupt end
So I'm assuming she realized after she did it that I wasn't a fool and wasn't going to play into her games, once again
OR, she pulled something even more sneaky...something else DH's sister and daughters like to do on occasion. Do something they figured would result in me complaining to DH about them, then turn around and do something to make themselves look like they were super innocent and nice to me instead (so I look like the bad guy not them). So in this case, had I voiced a complaint to DH about her after the previous call which yes we did discuss it, by her then making sure to phone, talk about SGD being in one of the dresses from me, having SGD saying "hi Grandma" "love you Grandma Disillusioned" then I look like an evil witch who thought and said the worst
Such a set up
Whichever it was, or even if both, I'm on to her
Glad she had a change of heart and made an effort regardless of her real agenda, but the damage is done
I still have no desire to have anything more than a cordial superficial relationship with her at this point. As someone pointed, much like a relationship (or lack of) with a coworker of DH's for example
I won't be doing any of the sweet thoughtful things any longer. Sure I'll sign the card for SGD's birthday, but DH can do everything now.
My part in all of that 'motherly/grandmotherly' stuff, is now officially scaled down