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Update to counseling

whatamess's picture

I'm happy to report that my DH and I are going to our first counseling session on Monday. After another big fight last week, he finally agreed. I'm nervous but hopeful. I have no idea what to expect. I've been in therapy for quite a whole but have never been to a marriage session. Thanks for everyone's support and feedback to my last post. I'll keep everyone updated.

Orange County Ca's picture

It's amazing how much insight a good counselor has. If you're not satisfied with the results after perhaps 4 sessions find another counselor. This should not be a ongoing thing here after all we're talking about adults who understand the language. I.e. by the end of 2 months of weekly sessions you should have the tools you need to fix this. If not somebody doesn't want to get fixed. Best of luck and no reason to be nervous. S/he puts their underpants on just like everyone else, one leg at a time.

MarriedaBallessWonder's picture

It's VERY important that your new counselor specializes in step-familes. If they aren't familiar with them, he/she may be of no help to you at all.

The first MC didn't deal a great deal with step-families and eventually started literally falling asleep on us! LOL! So of course we quit him and found one who specialized in step-families, was a step-father himself and wrote a book on step-families. He was very helpful. Then we had to move to a new state. =0(

GOOD LUCK!

MarriedaBallessWonder's picture

Yup, he would literally nod off. The first time we thought he may have had a rough night or something so we let it go and even laughed about it. Then he did it again tow more times and I was furious. So we left and never went back.

SugarSpice's picture

glad to hear this. as long as he is willing to go, there is hope.

sadly for me, the situation is getting worse. dh is getting further and further enmeshed with sds, and now it looks like mil might be moving in with us. mil adores sds and thinks they can do no wrong. and dh expects me to be nursemaid to his elderly mother who really needs to be in nursing home.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Agree about drawing the line at the MIL, especially right now. Tell him you need to get your own house in order before MIL moves in.

K.C.'s picture

Definitely draw the line w/ your MIL. Ours lives with us (2 family house, next wall over) and it was the worst decision ever.