where H got to talk about how he felt about my cease and desist letter.  It can be like having a referee.  He didn't like that I did it but he finally agreed that I had to do something as more and more people (T's hubby) were starting to get involved.

Guess T's been off the wall in dealing with him.  Not my problem (although I didn't say that, just listened).

He brought up how he is concerned about T's "babies", the Drunkie, Fatman etc.  He doesn't want to see anything happen to them.  I softly and gentley said that it was too late, they were already done in by T a long time ago.  The Counselor asked H if he felt T was using them to get sympathy and attention?  Even H had to admit that T knew what was going on, with Drunkie before he got real bad.  That he had been through out of high school, 6 weeks before graduating, because he had been caught with marijuana and pipes in the front seatof his car (yep, he left the stuff right on the passenger's seat in plain view.  Then, when he was sentenced by court to finish up his high school as a GED to get the drug charge (he was over 18 by a few months) he just managed to scrap by as T would let him just glide along.  Example was when he had a test to take he was suppose to be there at a certain time.  He didn't get up on time and T just let him sleep even leaving to go shopping (H and I happened to be there house hunting when this incident happened).  H pointed out that Drunkie hadn't gotten up and T just shrugged it off and out she went.  BUT, when she came back and claimed she just then found out that D hadn't gotten up and gone she had a hissey fit against, not him, but everyone else around.  How could HE do that to her, what is she to do.  Yes, I know the youngster was responsible for  himself, but heck, he was just a few months over 18 and would have been just out of high school.

My point to H and the Counselor was that T is always a victim and even uses her own "babies" to get her attention and sympathy.

If that had been my DD, you can bet the heck I would have gotten her up and, if I even thought she had an inkling of not going, drove her butt down to the testing place.

Counselor said it was a cry for help from the Drunkie, which my H jumped on right away.  Whoa, said C., that cry is not your problem.  You cannot step in and do anything for him because T won't let you.

There are more  of these, but the thing is that Drunkie went from marijuana to booze (supposedly, according to both T and her hubby) he doesn't do drugs, booze is his choice.  Somehow I think not but NOT MY PROBLEM>