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She's Back....Not Twit, but the former Bride-to-Be

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Yep, she's back. One would have hoped she got it right when she dropped Twit's son. Seems they are going to pick up right where she left off....re-engaged, a date set, and Twit is all atwitter.

Twit called DH the day after Christmas to give him the news. She is trilled because this is the only one of her losers that has even come close to having any kind of relationship with a woman. None of the others have dated, have gal pals, etc. and this BTB is the only girl/woman the one has ever gone out with.

Get this, Twit is over joyed telling DH how the dating pool in that area is so shallow and stagnant that they had to IMPORT someone for her "baby". This is in regards to the young woman being from a Western European country.

Oh, she has so much to do planning things; she knew they would get back together which is why she wanted to lose weight (umm, Twit, a wedding is for the Bride and Groom not for you to try to outshine them).

Lord pray for us, more nonsense coming.

She did say that she didn't know if DH & I would be invited to the wedding or not. To which DH replied that was okay with him because then he didn't have to send a gift. Boy, you could have heard a pin drop on her end as this was meant to hurt but DH turned the tables.

At that point DH told her we had somewhere to go and hung up.

And here I thought the young lady had some smarts.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Over coffee I asked DH if he wanted to go to the wedding, whenever it is, or not. DH surprised me when he said nope, he had no plans, invited or not, of going. Too much drama for him. AND, he continued, we are not going to send any shower gifts or anything.

He does hope that planning their wedding (I bet that is going to go over well) will keep her occupied for a long time. We toasted on that thought.

This comment from her: how the dating pool in that area is so shallow and stagnant that they had to IMPORT someone good enough for her "baby". Heck, if the guy wasn't a loser he would have met some nice girls when he was going to high school etc. Even back then Mama Twit had to set him up for his prom, with the daughter of one of her pot and pan customers and that never panned out though Twit had high hopes.

SonOfABrisketMaker's picture

Are you saying that your SD is marrying the foreign exchange student that BM was hosting?

sammigirl's picture

You are saying that the pot and pan business is still up and running and is "not stagnant".

Keep us posted on the wedding plans.

Glad your DH got you off the hook of buying pots and pans.

Good for you and him.

Veritas's picture

SDM, didn't you buy her a good set of pans a while ago??? What ever happened to that set?

sandye21's picture

Yes, wasn't there a time when Twit was upset because she was going to have to give back money to some family members who had ordered pots and pans for the bride? We all wondered at the time where the money went.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Yes. Twit was hitting DH and I up for money to refund her hubby's people who had bought items from her (like a shower) for the BTB. We never got into that because there is no way I was going to let Twit make a profit of me. When the couple broke up, his family wanted to return the items and get their money back. I don't blame them.

I was going to send the BTB a set of Al-Clad. I remember in talking it out on the board here, many advised it was just too soon, and they were right. I held off. Boy was I glad I did.

Am I sending anything now? Nope. I agree with DH. In fact, should we get an invite I would so not like to attend because as DH says, the drama will be intense.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Yes, I was going to get her a nice set of Al-Clad rather than buy the pot and pan stuff that Twit was pushing. But as the wedding date was not even set then and back then they were going to bet married in 2018.

Fortunately I didn't purchase it at that time, and then when they broke up I was glad I had waited.

If you recall, Twit sent pot and pan catalogs to every one so that they could buy "shower" gifts for the BTB and that was last January.

sandye21's picture

"She did say that she didn't know if DH & I would be invited to the wedding or not. To which DH replied that was okay with him because then he didn't have to send a gift. Boy, you could have heard a pin drop on her end as this was meant to hurt but DH turned the tables."

Twit's like bridezilla on steroids - and she's not even the bride. SDM, I would never intend to insult you, and it is understandable you do not see too much humor in this considering your experiences with Twit, but I laughed with joy reading DH's reply to Twit - how far he has come since you moved away from the insanity.

Ya, she wanted DH to beg, but I'll bet she calls back with an invitation. Narcissists get very concerned about image, as demonstrated in how she looks rather than the bride, but they also want everything to 'appear' perfect, including loving Grandparents at the wedding.

If your grandson is smart he will elope.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Oh Sandye, you don't insult me at all. I am glad you laughed, because I did too. Some of the Twit's, heck, most of the things Twit does, can be laughed at when you put her in perspective, and in hindsight. She really is to be pitied. Yes, DH has come a long way, but he does have the occasional slide back.

Of course she wants us to beg. I am interested to see how this play out. In fact, I thought about your postings about narcissists when she talked about her weight loss etc. You can bet she is gonna try to outshine the bride, already is.

This is icky, but I have to tell someone. Twit brags and is proud that she saved the skin from when her babies were circumcised as ifants. Ewwww. Not exactly like keeping a lock of the baby's hair.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Hi Secret - Yep, that is what I thought too when she told me. She actually bragged about it.

Acratopotes's picture

remember the movie - meet the fockers lol......

that mummy saved the foreskin as well hahahahahahaha....

and if I recall - it landed in the fondue pot

SacrificialLamb's picture

Pots and Pans Part II! Maybe she will watch her money more closely this time....NAH.

But what an ACCOMPLISHMENT for her......her baby getting married.....so unique and rare.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Now she probably won't bother repaying those relatives for the pots and pans they bought from her for the BTB. Remember when she tried to hit us up for $$$ because her hubby's relatives wanted to return the stuff and get their $$ back when the couple broke up.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

I journal, have done so most of my life, and in writing down some of my dealings with Twit I am amazed, sometimes flabbergasted, at what she does and says.

Powerfamily's picture

It sounds like you DH is enjoying the peace and quite the miles between your house and Twit's house gives you.

Exjuliemccoy's picture

So glad to hear that your DH is now out of the FOG and keeping Twit out of your peaceful life. He's come a very long way.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Sandye says: "Narcissists get very concerned about image, as demonstrated in how she looks rather than the bride, but they also want everything to 'appear' perfect, including loving Grandparents at the wedding."

Great point there. Actually hadn't thought about the loving Grandparents angle. You bet she is going to scheme up something. This invite thingy didn't work, as she figured he/we would beg and she would get her kicks out of that. Sad isn't it, that Twit actually gets pleasure out of hurting people she claims she loves (her father not me).

Totally twisted.

Goodluck's picture

WHO is going to sponsor this foreign exchange student? He will have to go back to his homeland and apply for a visa TO come here. Are they minors?
HE cant work for a period of time too. Who is going to financially support them? THAT part must be very clear before passing go.

This is very complicated and expensive for anyone who wants to marry an American from a foreign country.

Grab the popcorn, sit back and watch this one.

Oyyyy veyyyyyy

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

She already has a visa....won the lottery on that. Really!

She attended college here on a scholarship from her home country. She got back here, on that visa last December so she can stay and work here. They were living together until she broke up with the loser back, oh, I forget when right now. Now she is apparently back and ready to continue where she left off.

That is what I mean by drama. That WHOLE bunch has too much drama going on for me, that I don't want to get into. Unfortunately, due to DH being Twit's father, I find at times getting dragged into it. Heck, I didn't move to the other side of the country to have Twit still drive me nuts.

And yes, grab the popcorn, me included, as this is going to be not only a rocky road but should be entertaining as well.

You are lifesavers as I can vent here and not have to vent to DH, though he, too, has gotten tired of it. She is still his daughter and always will be.

notasm3's picture

I think it would be much too hard for you two "elderly" (my age) folks to attend a wedding that far away. Smile

If SS32's GF ever decides to marry him the wedding would not be 5 miles from us. That young woman so far has had enough sense not to marry SS or to put anything in his name even though they have a 2 year old child together.

I would happily send DH off to be father of the groom. But I would not go. I seriously doubt if I would be invited because you know I won't let them use my "stuff".

Have you met this young woman? Is there any chance she might help the grandson actually become a man? Assuming he could escape Twit's tentacles.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Yes, I have met her. She is a very smart young lady. Grandson did a 5 year stint in the Marines and that did him good, but Twit worked very hard to bring him back to being dependent on her after he got out. This one probably has more sense than the rest of the Twit family all combined.

He always got along well with me, would stop by, etc. But once Twit saw that she made sure that was stopped pretty darn quickly. I remember when DH put that darn door in for her a few summers back (when she wanted him to put all new windows in for her and he refused because, heck...he's old) This young man actually took time before he showed up to look up how to put a door in! He was a GREAT help to DH and DH was quite impressed. The other two total losers were useless.

So, when I mentioned to Twit just how good a job the young man had done in working with DH, Twit actually put him down saying that he doesn't know how to do that stuff, wouldn't know where to begin etc....! I was quite shocked at how she put him down, but then it fits as she wants to keep them all emotionally tied to her. And, she made those comments about the young man right in front of him, his girlfriend etc.! I commented that he had been in the Marines and had learned a heck of a lot in there about doing all kinds of things, which Twit just poo-pooed.

Oh, both of these young people are college grads with good jobs and, as I have posted before, no student loans so they are off to a good start if they go through with it.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

notasm3 - Oops, didn't answer your question. Yes, this lady doesn't put up with much nonsense. Even DH says she is going to make a man out of Twit's baby.

I do know that they were planning on moving back to her country in about 4-5 years and Twit was having an absolute fit about that. When I said to Twit, what was the problem, there were planes that go overseas and the internet to keep in touch, Twit responded that she had to have her baby close by where she could get to him.

IMHO, the further away from Momma Twit, the better for them and their marriage.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Hi Sandye - Agree. When I heard Twit say that I knew these youngsters had to get FAR away or they were not going to make it.

And if you think this is bad, just wait until grandkids come along. This is Twit's only hope for grandchildren and she has been waiting a long time. Just the thought makes me want to get down on my knees and pray for the young lady right now as she is going to go through h*ll with Twit.

And Twit already has it set up that her baby is under her thumb.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Got another pot and pan catalog with the same old note of buying for the BTB. Like that is going to happen. Because I am feeling in a devilish mood, I put it in an envelope and sent it back to her, no note, nothing. AND, I am not sending anything else, period.

You gotta say one thing....Twit is persistent with them pots and pans. Wonder if she sent more catalogs to the people who bought things before the BTB broke off the engagement the first time. My guess? Probably.

sandye21's picture

Unbelievable but true! Twit never fails! LOL LOL You deserve to be devilish once in a while after what you've been through.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Oh Sandye, once she sees the postmark she is going to know it was returned by me and probably call up with a hissy fit to DH. Since he doesn't know I did it I can always respond, in typical Twit talk, that I have no clue as to what she is talking about. That is what Twit use to say when confronted with her carp so it is time for her to get it back.

SacrificialLamb's picture

"I have no clue as to what she is talking about. That is what Twit use to say when confronted with her carp so it is time for her to get it back."

Oh yes. "Daddeeeeeee (start crying about here, big whiiiiiiinnne)...I didn't do anything wrong! Oh wait, maybe I did, but I didn't do it on purpose. Oh wait, maybe I did, but I couldn't help it. But I didn't do it out of spite! Oh yeah, I did do those things, but I apologized."

I've heard all that crap.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

SacrificialLamb said: "Daddeeeeeee (start crying about here, big whiiiiiiinnne)...I didn't do anything wrong! Oh wait, maybe I did, but I didn't do it on purpose. Oh wait, maybe I did, but I couldn't help it. But I didn't do it out of spite! Oh yeah, I did do those things, but I apologized.""

Boy, you are right about that except for one thing. Twit never apologizes for anything because she never thinks she did anything wrong. And, that is where Twit starts claiming that I called her a liar, boo hoo hoo. In the past that was a sure thing that DH would get on me even though I never called her that (to her face). Might think it, post it here, but never to her face because I know how she operates.

SacrificialLamb's picture

Mine does not think she does anything wrong either but when she gets caught she always has an excuse. Her excuses always evolve based on how much evidence there is about her guilt. She still tries to climb out of a hole.

She's a huge victim. So she still doesn't think she did anything wrong, but if she gets caught red-handed, she is the quintessential victim. Boohooing, diverting the blame elsewhere, can't believe I have so much animosity towards her.

She is one of those people who can tell her father to F### Off then the next day say she never said it. As if she can rewrite history and history will bow to her new interpretation.

Both of our SDs are middle aged. And that tells us this will never end. This is drama we will have to put up with for the rest of our lives.

notasm3's picture

If I were the bride I'd probably register pots and pans at another store. }:) }:) }:)

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Hey Sandye - When you said in an earlier post that we'd be hearing from Twit as appearances are everything to her and she would want "loving grandparents" there to show off her PERFECT family, it looks like you may be right.

Today Twit called actually just to talk to DH (what a surprise!) She actually spent the call asking him how he was doing, feeling, how I was etc. When DH got off the phone he wondered what is going on, being concerned about us is something Twit never does. I told him that she was probably trying to butter us up so we would go way back there for this wedding.

But then she could be up to something else all together....like just checking up to see if we had any bad health news, etc. You know, keeping an eye on what she really wants....stuff.

The good thing was that DH was leery of her calling just to talk and see how we are. I cannot remember that ever happening before. She always wants something so I am not wasting time trying to figure out what, just making a mental note that she is up to something.

sandye21's picture

SDM, From your experience with Twit, has she EVER been nice, concerned about your health, etc., out of the goodness of her heart? Without there being a 'hidden' motive? Ya, she wants the 'perfect' family but do you think if she decides to include you in the wedding you will be expected to fund something? Really glad you are suspicious of this sudden change of heart. She's up to something alright. It will be interesting to find out what it is. Just hope DH sticks to his decision not to go.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

For some reason I missed this comment Sandye and wanted to respond.

Absolutely NO! Twit has never ever been nice or concerned about my health etc. And she really doesn't bother about her Father's either except when she can strut about crying oh look at [me] and all I am doing and how I am going out of my way, etc. Aka....showboating.

Invited or not, I have no intention of going to this wedding though I would love to see what an arse Twit makes of herself in front of the bride's parents who will start to see what a loon she is as she tries to outshine, not only the bride, but everyone involved.

Years back her hubby's father passed away and his family had an auction to liquidate the estate. So, what does Twit do? She decides the family needs to have a "family reunion" about 3 weeks later and she prints up invites to it. It was going to be at her house (you do not think this cretin was going to do anything that costs her $$$?). Every one is suppose to bring something and she assigned what the should bring. Anyway, the point here is that here is this big family auction that the oldest sister of Twit's hubby is the executor of, and Twit is trying to get attention.

BTW, we never went to that reunion. Never invited but then they are not our people. Which is just fine with me.

sandye21's picture

A family reunion 3 weeks after a funeral? She didn't even bother to refer to the event as something other than a family reunion - such as 'remembrance' or 'celebration of life'? Wow!! Just wow!!!

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Actually it was 3 months after the funeral, but still the same thing. The family is still grieving and she does something like that. Go figure. No, that is what a narcissistic witch she is. A third note wonder on the musical scale ---- doe, re, ME, ME, ME.

MurphysLaw's picture

SDMC,
Basically Twit is:
The Bride at Every Wedding &
The Corpse at Every Funeral.

She’s a nut job.

shes driving me crazy in my retirement's picture

Murphy - I love that. You are so right!

What Twit doesn't realize is that having a big house etc. doesn't make you part of the social circle, as she wants to be. This is a woman who doesn't even know how to set a table...by that I mean what side the forks and knives go. But then dining for her is to grab something and go sit on the couch and watch tv.

I don't think she attends funerals, except the FIL and MIL. That would be too caring about any one except herself. Though, and I have seen this twice since I have known her, she does grab on to older people because she is hoping they will give her stuff, leave her stuff. Saw that with a neighbor she had back in IL. Remember her telling me how pizzed she was that she helped this woman out in her old age and the woman had the audacity to leave her house and contents to her church!

Twit had her eye on some of the antiques the woman had. I recall it being strange when she told us about this, but I didn't know her that well back then. Wish I could say that now.