SD sabotages our time with her drama
Hello! My first post!
My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 2 years. His 28 year old daughter lives several states away(thank God) and constantly gets him on the phone complaining about her marriage, her lack of ability to keep a job (she refuses to keep a job longer than a couple of months at a time because everything isn't "perfect", etc.) She's a TOTAL victim in EVERY aspect of her lazy life. She never takes any responsibility for anything that has happened to her. She sabotages every single situation(job, friendships, relationships) she gets herself into to make herself appear to be the victim.
We have told her probaly 100 times "You two need counseling"(her crappy marriage is pure crap because they are both toddlers), "Life is tough. Jobs are tough. We must persevere if we want to make a living and have a nice life"(if one little thing upsets her at work, she is out of there. She simply quits.)
She refuses to help herself and refuses to do anything anyone ever advises her to do. She just prefers to be a victim and feel sorry for herself. He's somewhat of an enabler and I've been pointing out to him that he should stop coddling her so much and push her to take responsibility for all of these failed attempts at being a responsible adult. He hears me and is trying but 28 years of witnessing this disaster has him sort of numb and he seems to prefer to not ruffle her feathers with truths.
His mother passed away last summer(bless her sweet soul) and one of the things she said to us in her hospital room was "Don't let ****** come between you two.". Even SHE knew that her grandaughter was a total troublemaker and manipulator in perpetual victim mode.
I recently told him that I cannot continue letting her sabotage moments of my/our life with her constant drama that never seems to cease. Only increase. I politely asked him to help me with that....no more allowing her to sabotage OUR time for NOTHING.
Am I being too hard on both of them?