I DID it. I wrote down a list of the deal breakers that have occured in my blended "family". I didn't realize that so many things have happened to me over the last 17 years. When i read it back I cried. Something snapped I think a switch turned off inside me. I sat down with DH and showed him the list answered any questions he had about anything and he just sat there for like an hour. Then he went picked up the phone called the newlywed and told him that How he treated me during this whole process was just plain wrong. He told him that the 25.00 gift card was a slap in my face and how it hurt him to know he had raised someone who could treat me so badly. I could hear SS making excuses on the other end and DH stopped him in his tracks each time. He said "I want you to call me later when you get off work so we can finish this discussion" he told SS he really needed to think about what he had done and how I had been there for him since he was eight and done more for him than anyone even DH and his own mother. I was shocked and amazed. The last thing he said was "I expect you to call me tonight so we can work this out and get this family on track so that it works for everyone. Ill speak to you tonight." That was on Monday. It has been three days and nothing from SS. We got three cheap souveniers in the mail with a card that said ENJOY!! Love -us. That's it! Not a word. DH is devestated I'm not even a little surprised as I know SS is spinning this to others as his dad attacking him right after his wedding because of me. I told DH welcome to my world dude! I have never seen him so emotionally distraught. He said he created this and he feels awful. I think he assumed they would eventually grow up and be mature. I am giving him support and space and time to process this whole thing because it IS BIG! He is realizing who his children are and that's got to be hard. He keeps apologizing to me and saying "how could I not see this as many times as you have tried to tell me". I said because they are your children and you love them. So we shall see. I plan on writing SS a letter in a few weeks and asking for the 1,500.00 back as it was understood to be a loan( he acknowledeged this when I gave him the $) DH agrees with this as we seem to be the only folks who shelled out so much for this thing. He says otherwise he will wait for his son to respond. I see it really bothers him and that makes me like SS even less than I did. So for the first time in 17years I feel like I in a real relationship with DH and hope SS comes around and wants to be part of a REAL family. Thanks for letting me vent!