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Question: Would you

Newimprvmodel's picture

Drive 6 hrs one way to take SD and her husband out for dinner and then drive home the very next day another 6 hrs?  Her birthday is next month and DH feels the need to do this a few days after the blessed event. Yes he last saw her in Aug.  I agreed to this even though he knew my vote was to wait until we had a free weekend. And the kicker is that she is spending her actual birthday weekend with surprise- her in-laws!!  So she drives many times a year the same distance to see them but has not seen her father since the summer. 
I get that it is his daughter. I will book the hotel we stay in because I want a damn nice place. Lol. 

Newimprvmodel's picture

I hemmed on it and tried to convince him of going on like a weekend or longer but he's on this kick where he feels like he has neglected the kiddos. The email he sent her was pathetic. He actually wrote that he's trying to make amends about visiting and he doesn't want to intrude with their work or anything.  "WE don't want to intrude on you and we simply want to take you out for your birthday, blah blah. I wanted to puke. and I will book the hotel because I want to stay where I want to stay. and I've already turned over a new leaf by announcing. NO. CAKE.   NO. NO. NO.  

ndc's picture

No. I wouldn't travel 12 hours just for dinner. If I was traveling that far, I'd want to do it over a weekend where we'd either see SD for more than the hour or two that dinner would take or have something else to do in the area. . 

CajunMom's picture

Not just for dinner. Or, as Yesterdays said, it would be for a long weekend and that dinner would be nestled in between all the fun stuff I could plan in said city/town. Other than that, DH would go by himself.

ESMOD's picture

I drive 4 hours each way in one day to see my dad for 1 or 2 hours... I think my dh and I would make the drive


Rags's picture

Though I love road trips and would research cool stops to check  out and back, stay in some amazing B&Bs or historical hotels, hit unique restaurants, etc....  I would taylor which car I took to the nature of the trip.  If there are ghost towns along the way we would take DW's SUV. If it was all paved roads, we would take my sports car.

Make it about you and DH having a nice time while keeping the dinner with the SKid as only a relatively insignficant part of the trip.  Do not let DH harp on about the SKid.

Newimprvmodel's picture

She is taking the day off from work so it will NOT be a trip for us or me. Ugh. 

Rags's picture


What you do on the 6 hour drive to the dinner, and the 6 hour drive home after dinner has nothing to do with SD taking time off.  Make it a day and half there and a day and half back. Give the dinner an insignificant few hours at most.


Have fun... before and after... the torturous dinner.

Notthedoormat's picture

But at 4 hours vs 6....and I would rather do the drive by dinner than a drawn out weekend or long weekend because that minimizes the time I actually have to spend suffering through the visits.  All that driving for an overnight stay sucks,  but I'll take it over multiple days anytime. 

Newimprvmodel's picture

And I do get a night out including dinner. We are not big spenders so this will be fun. I am thinking of this visit as if we were visiting a niece. No baggage. No strings attached. I don't have to do anything but polite conversation. 

Newimprvmodel's picture

I love your emojis!  SD will be a tiny part of this trip.