Proud of myself :)
I am estranged from adult 21yo SD. Her choice, not mine. We were always on good terms, but her psychotic mother has a strong hold on her and has never liked me. She said I and my kids are a bad influence, because I had them out of wedlock. Never mind that her own kids from one of her multiple failed marriages have kids out of wedlock and have spent time in jail. SD has kept clean so far, but she is involved with a guy and friends who do a lot of sexual experimentation and kinky stuff and will probably wind up pregnant as well. Right now she is involved in some 3-way relationship. Her mother doesn't know, they think she's a little innocent angel.
Anyway, SD announced her voluntary estrangement out of the blue this summer. I wasn't looking forward to seeing her at thanksgiving dinner at my in-laws, but they're my family too so I will be damned if I won't go. She showed up late and was quite obviously avoiding eye contact and trying to pretend I wasn't there. So I said loudly, " Hello, SD, how are you?" with a polite smile. This forced her to have to acknowledge and respond, or look like an ass.
That's it. It's a little thing, but it made me glad to be able to take the high road and minimize her drama.
Love it when we take the high
Love it when we take the high road and get in their face.
I kinda like to watch them squirm. It's too bad that at age 21 they still don't have manners, just a stick up their ass. Or whatever she's "into" of late, lol.
Job well done!
You have a right to be with
You have a right to be with the family and if the SD doesn't like it she can not show up.
BTW, you did the right thing, you acknowledged her in front of everyone. Thus she can't moan later about how you ignored her etc.
Good for you! They end up
Good for you! They end up looking rude and stupid - which they are.
A couple of years ago at Christmas SD always said thanks dad for ALL her gifts even though they were all clearly marked from both of us. She did this for years and it pissed me off. I just let it go all the time - well because you know they are poor COD.
I had enough that year and when she said thanks dad one more time - I said ``AND 20-YEARS!`so she could hear me loud and clear. Well she got her panties in a bunch over being called out on her rudeness and made a big stink about it.
Oh well, we don`t have to worry about that anymore - NO gifts will ever have my name on them again and certainly none of my hard earned cash will be used either.
Thanks for the words of
Thanks for the words of support. The only thing I regret is that my relationship with my mother in law seems damaged. She has had long conversations with BM during which I was blamed for just about everything except the Kennedy assassination. BM calls her. The estrangement with SD occurred after SD got upset with someone else (not me) but since I refused to get involved in the fight, she disowned me. Since that time, she has created a million and one grievances, none of which we ever heard a word about until now. Sadly I think my MIL fell for it all. Well, I cannot do anything about it.
You are not their blood.
You are not their blood. Your SD is, and therefore your in laws will always take her side. I have it the same way with my in laws. But that is okay with me, at this stage of my life, I still have my own parents, siblings, and of course my kids. There is a huge divide with my in laws over DH's daughters. I never refer to them as my anything.