Plz how to cope with what seems incest

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Posting again...caught hubby and his dd sneaking around...went upstairs one nite at 1:42 am...as soon as I got to the top step, dd swooshed past me into the bathroom n shut the door. Our bedroom door was open, dh laying on the bed with one leg off the side, the light was on. He pretended to be asleep. He had his undies on, I didn't see what she had on. Could have been a coincidence that they were up at the same time I came upstairs.

Just this morning I got up early n heard ppl walking around upstairs. I went upstairs and again my step dd was going into the bathroom with nothing on but a t shirt. She is 23 and runs around half naked all the time. Dh was in our room, standing up, undies on, looking at his phone

Am i crazy or could they be sexually involved? He told her she reminds him of her mom. She is pretty with no boyfriend. Why woukd dd want this?

He agreed to go thru a book on emotional incest with me and marriage counsel in sept. The emotional incest term came up cuz he confides in his dd about me n our marriage

How do I cope with my suspicions? What if they ARE making out or worse? How to broach the subject? I will try to get proof

Eww. If I even had suspicions

Eww. If I even had suspicions, I would insist that she move out ASAP and marriage counseling starts also, ASAP.

She's 23, no need for her to live there anymore. If he refuses, move out yourself, to make the point that you will not continue this way.

That's all kinds of wrong

At her age she should be living on her own. And if she is living with anyone other than her own partner, she should be covering herself appropriately when out in the common spaces of the home. That should be an immediate rule. And if DH is lounging around in his undies or getting up for the day and still only in his undies, why is his/your bedroom door open??

Whether or not there is incest, there appear to be loose boundaries about privacy and appropriate clothing. And if there IS incest, you need to get out fast and they both need serious mental health counseling. I'd mention your concern to both of them at the same time. Their response might be very telling.

I would be out of that house

I would be out of that house so darn fast the dust would be flying out the windows.

LEAVE, this man is a creep.

Gross. From your previous

Gross. From your previous posts there is no reason she can't be living on her own. Whether the impropriety is physical, mental, or both, you can't live like this. How can you be intimate with him when you think he may be intimate with his daughter? Even if they are just emotionally incestuous and hang out or cuddle in their undies without having sex, how can you not vomit every time you see them?

Well my first hubby was a

Well my first hubby was a narcissist and with info n education I learned to play his game. Got tired of it but left feeling like I 'beat him at his own game'. I know, shouldn't waste energy like that.

Something weird about me, I love psychology. I am currently drafting a Curriculum for high schools regarding recognizing personality disordered ppl...so ppl can learn to run and save themselves n their future children pain.

I know this may seem sick, but though all this shiz sickens n hurts me, I am interested in a scientific way. Why do they tic like this and is there redemption for ppl who abuse their kids with emotional let alone sexual abuse. I just want to see if he will go to counsel and stop emotionally abusing her. I plan on throwing her out if I get concrete proof. I am HOPING that healing can/will happen.

In the meantime I will play this sick game, and I know I need counseling toi, bur I operate in passive aggressiveness. For example, his wedding album disappeared.

Running would be easy and with no benefit to me...we are only married 3 months plus his ex wife got everything...her name is even on the house I live in and on the bills that show up...of course he gave me lip service that he would change these things.

I want to stick in there to see if he will do what he says. If he will see, by a counselor's mouth that he is abusing his daughter and giving her what isn't hers to have.

He bought me a $3k wedding band. Maybe to make ex wife jealous as of course I posted pics on social media.

I may be sick for staying and hoping. I may be stupid for engaging in this game and learning ti cope with daily crap sandwiches. But I REALLY want this marriage to work. If he does what it takes I will stay. Hopefully the counselor will tell him to find his balls n kick her out

So I feel bad now asking how to cope when I know I am gonna stay in the game on purpose. Maybe that makes me as a pers. Disordered person, but hope for healing is there too

It's obvious daddy is doing

It's obvious daddy is doing/abusing daughter, emotionally AND sexually. I can be weak, but if I'd experienced what you did, I'd have been out STAT!

It's not abuse when the daughter consents...

Yep, the daughter isn't being abused, she's doing this wth full consent and she is no longer a minor. The husband and the daughter won't change for anyone or anything...they are both getting their kicks. He'll just pay lip service and that doesn't last long.

Just because she's 23, it

Just because she's 23, it does not mean she isn't abused. The abuse could've started since when she was a little girl. If I was the wife, I would help the girl and throw the husband in jail.

My guess is the abuse started...

when he was married to BM...however, DaughterWife hates her BM and adores Daddyyyy so the day she turned 18 and for the next 6 years, she willingly participated in the relationship with her Daddyyyy.

I met exH when DaughterWife was 19 yrs old and they hid things for several years.

Oh, the things I could say to BM if/when we cross paths....ugh, to not protect her daughter. They're all a bunch of Narcissists (NPD) in the very real clinical sense. Very disorderd individuals.