Need some perspective
Ah yes. There never is an end to the unexpected crap that comes with being married to a man with grown kids. I’ve got a new situation to wrap my head around and need some perspective. Here goes:
Hubby and I are out of state for combo work and vacation. H’s son lives in said state, in a different city from where we are vacationing (a four-hour drive from where H and I are).
When it comes to the skids behavior, the son is not nearly as bad as the two daughters. The son is, however, totally indifferent to me. He can acknowledge my presence, but that’s about it. In the 20 years I’ve been with H, the son has never asked me a single question about me or my life (my job, my family, etc.). I mean heck, after 20 years the kid knows virtually nothing about me. OK fine. I’m well with that since I have disengaged.
So, the son invited H and I to a concert in his city. Now, whenever I am included in any plans, my experience has taught me to assume that my inclusion is pretty much H’s idea and any skid includes me because of H’s expectation, weak as it may be. In these rare get-togethers, I don’t have fun and feel tense and uncomfortable the whole time, mostly because I’m ignored or shown indirectly that I am simply tolerated. I’ve learned to turn down any invitation, knowing they are insincere, and encourage H to go alone. I do think it is important for H to spend time with his kids and I see no reason to choose to be uncomfortable by going with him on visits. I’m done with that and at peace with staying away as my method of self-preservation.
Since we are traveling with a dog, I felt H should go to the concert with his son and I would stay with our dog, (whose company I prefer anyway). That is what we did and I am fine with it.
What I didn’t know was the son bought four tickets to the concert, ostensibly two for he and his girlfriend, and two for H and me. Here’s the surprise: H just got home and told me that his son gave “my” ticket to another female. So, the foursome was son, his girlfriend, H and a female friend. If you didn’t know any better, you might think is was a double date and a blind date for H and the female.
This just seems like a really huge dick move to me. Am I wrong?