I wont go into all the boring details right here because it would be a TL;DR situation. So i will start with the most recent/current problem in the list of many: My youngest SD is about to graduate college in a couple of months. She has just informed us that she can only get 4 tickets to invite people to her grad. She wants (understandably) her late 80s aged greatgrandma to come as she has had no children or grandchildren to grad college. SD will be the first (and possibly only) great grand child to do so in her life time. This woman helped raise the kids when their mother left until my husband received full custody. So i understand. That leaves 3 tickets...of course she wants her mother to come, she wants her dad there...that leaves one ticket. She is having a hard time deciding who gets that one... because he boyfriend, whom she USED to live with until he decided to move out and in with friends, but still wants her around one night a week (who has no good job, is in his late 20s and i think i know why he wants her that one night a week). anyway..I think this boy has no plans to be with her long term, shes been crazy about him since she was 14 (and he was 19 or 20 then). He's pretty much used her when her mother was paying their rent, etc, (guilt of having left them you know) until he was able to move elsewhere. SD of course, does not see this,or doesnt wish to think about it. So she says since he helped her with much of her studying and therefore being able to pass subjects...she wants him to come and is torn as to how to divide the 4 tix into 5 ppl. SIGH.. i think personally its high time for those girls to realize, DH persued me and asked me to marry him. We are a team. Shouldnt he make it known to them that we are a unit. (Biblically speaking as well as legally). and that if one doesnt go, the other wont. Personally if it came down to him not getting to go, i would step aside because this IS a big deal as the older SD is probably never going to see college as she is married, pregnant and having to work full time to maintain as her husband doesnt bring in much to the budget. So,SERIOUSLY PLEASE..am I wrong to think this??? if so, PLEASE tell me b/c honestly i would almost rather it be that I expect too much, than to think that I just am not being respected enough to be included. It would have helped if, almost 8 years ago when he proposed, he would have sat down and talked to them and told them what he told me, ..that he had been giving up his life for them for years and it was time for him to have happiness and that if "they dont like it, maybe its time for them to live with their mother" (his words to me with no prompting, because at the time, it kinda stunned me lol). I have been the one to do without. BM finally remarried to the man she lived with for years. kept my husbands last name though. and tries to use it as if she is MRS. Dangerfield (not real name, got it from Rodney dangerfield getting NO RESPECT btw). Things like this have been going on since day one. I am just so sick of it. i STUPIDLY thought that when they grew up and moved out this would all end...how crazy was that....? thanks in advance if anyone has anything to help...its just hard. (we are not blended as i wasnt ablt to have children of my own).