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Maybe he is right

sickofbs8's picture

Maybe my hubby is right, I don't like his children. At least the oldest one. Not much to like when she lies constantly and uses her baby as a pawn. She only comes around when she wants something and she publicly makes fun of us. How can he completely over look all of this and be upset that I am not over the moon for princess? It is crazy. She deleted me and my daughter on fb, so I helped her out and blocked her butt. Let's see what is next. I bet more lies and drama.

catsmom01's picture

I know the feeling. Good idea to have her blocked on fb. I don't like my bf's daughter either, heck neither does her father lots of times. She's the same as your sd...only has time for someone when she wants $$. All you can do is ignore it and be glad she's not your monkey and it's not your circus... she's his problem to deal with.

twoviewpoints's picture

Stop discussing SD with DH. It's really none of his business why or if you blocked someone on your FB. Surely an evenings conversation can exclude chatter of whether or not you like his daughter. The SD doesn't live with you. You rarely have to see her as she only 'visits' a handful of times a year and a matter of hours when she does. Let the SD be out of sight, out of mind.

It's his daughter and he loves her. Yippee for him and her. Parents tend to do that. They love their children. Warts , poor behavior and all. Remove yourself from the drama that is SD. Change the subject. Give vague not interested replies ('that's nice', 'sorry to hear that' ). The less you allow either one of them with their dysfunctional relationship into your personal home life, the less it will affect you.

hereiam's picture

I agree with twoviewpoints, stop discussing her with your DH. Not only will their dysfunction affect you less, it will give your DH less chances to come to her defense (which causes arguments and resentment).

I think some parents will defend their kids when anybody says anything negative about them, even if they know it's the truth; they just feel that they must. Don't give him any reason to defend her. Maybe if he stops hearing himself counter the negatives, he will see them for himself. You would be surprised what silence can do.

Luckily, my DH has no blinders on when it comes to his daughters.

catsmom01's picture

Very true! It's a knee jerk reaction to come to their kids defense. Take yourself out of the equation and let him be 100% in the dysfunction with them.

sandye21's picture

I'll bet your DH is right. You don't like SD and for good reason. One of the most liberating things i did for myself was to tell DH, "I don't like SD and she doesn't like me." I agree with other posters - once you tell him he truth, don't discuss it anymore.

catsmom01's picture

Next time my bf says something like that to me...I'm going to say, "Well, it's nothing PERSONAL against your daughter...it's not that I don't like HER...it's just that I don't like people in general who lie, manipulate, steal, and live off of others."

sickofbs8's picture

All true. I just sometimes need to come on here and hear that I'm not crazy and I'm not alone. She is very low and I want no part of it. Thank you!

oneoffour's picture

My mother told me this gem to get around awkward situations ... "It isn't SD I don't like. It is her behaviour. I really cannot stand anyone who behaves like she does."

Which is perfectly true. If she behaved better you would probably like her more. It will never happen but it does throw the ball back into her court.