I got gutsy last night and invited SD24 and her son over for dinner!
Yes -- I did. I invited her and her son to come over on Halloween night for dinner, and then take son trick or treating if she wanted. She actually said "yes" and even said "yay" about being able to come over!
I haven't invited any of the skids (four of them) over for quite a while due to their behavior and treatment of me for years. SD24 is getting married and has been actually acting nice towards me and DH, so I softened and invited her (ONLY) over yesterday.
It actually went pretty good. I say "pretty" because there was a moment that I thought it was going to get bad because she was asking us for money for her upcoming wedding. I had already decided that we would help a little bit -- we're far from rich. So I gave her a check to pay for the marriage license, and told her we would help with the cake and maybe flowers. She is just having a small wedding with a few people, which I think is fabulous!
At first she comes in and asks her Dad for $5,000! She knew we would say no to that -- so I think it was just a hail mary, and then asked us if we would pay for the food. I told her that I thought it would be better if she did a potluck type situation, and just had everybody bring an appetizer type food. They are doing a late evening wedding on NY Eve, so everyone will have eaten by the time they get there. I thought this was fair. She actually seemed okay -- my DH started getting all riled up (unnecessarily so), and once he calmed down, she calmed down and then the rest of the evening went good.
She (I think) thought I had invited her brother and sister, and I told her nope -- just her! I didn't want to try and handle all of them. The younger two are still quite immature and mean, and SD18 still won't apologize for how awful she has been to me.
So SD24 invited her sister SD18 over, but thankfully she didn't show up until later -- after dinner! Phew!
But amazingly it was a pretty good evening! There is hope! I figure if I limit the time that they can come over that maybe we can have a decent relationship. So far, it's been going better. My guard is still up, but it will probably always be up -- but if I can have a decent relationship with them, then I'll be happy.
So for now -- things are alright.
Glad it went well! $5,000? Is
Glad it went well! $5,000? Is she planning her own royal wedding?
I know -- my SS23 spent
I know -- my SS23 spent $5,000 alone just for the venue for him and his new wife's wedding. Well, her parents took out a second mortgage to pay for the venue! Crazy! I would have said NO! But whatever.
SD24 whined a little bit when she was talking to us about planning this wedding -- she is just doing a small wedding anyways to keep costs down. She whined that SS23 had a nice wedding, why can't I? (ummmmmmmm because we are not going into debt to pay for YOUR wedding!) Then she whined "well, you paid for SS23's rehearsal dinner didn't you?" Yes, and it cost $200.
I did tell her that we could help out a little bit, but that we didn't have loads of money. I gave her a check that evening for their marriage license, and told her that we would pay for their cake (within reason!). She seemed satisfied with that. So all is good. It got a little dicey their for a minute or two!!
She invited her sis without
She invited her sis without asking me. I thought about telling her to not invite SD18 or SS20, but then figured that she would then tell SD18 and SS20 that I said that, and then things would be awkward with all. So yah, she just did it. That's typically the way they are anyways!