Hope I didn't shoot myself in the foot
I broke disengagement! Just long enough to message the steps and ask if they were coming over next weekend for DH's birthday. It's hard to plan if you don't know how many people are coming!
SS immediately answered saying he was coming which he had already mentioned he was. Of course none of the SDs have answered yet. I'm hoping they have outgrown the trying to make different plans if they know we are planning something.