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Free at last from the disrepectful b****rds !!!!

Oldfool's picture

As you all know, I totally despise my partner's worthless elsdest son, his daughter and the 9 year old BRAT. Things have come to a head. I had my 8 year old grandson and the 13 year old grandson at my home one day. My partner was working and the daughter turned up with the BRAT!!! He was unaware that she was coming as she has statrted dropping off the BRAT at the house some mornings per week for him to put her on the bus to make her own way to school (there is a busy road to cross but there are traffic lights). I do NOT get involved at all.he has to answer the door, see to her etc and even if I am there, I say hi and bye, NO SMALL TALK at all.....

It was the school holiday and my prnter had to work. His daughter turned up with the BRAT. He didnt know she was coming and she 'appeared' to unaware that he was going to work later in the day. I was left with the BRAT but I hear the BRAT argung with her mother in the passage.....

 

I had a DR appointment for my 8 yearold grandson later in the day and asked my 13 year old grandson if he would mind keeping an eye on the BRAT while I quickly took the 8 year old to the DR appointment . He said OK. I told the BRAT I wont be long at the Doctor as the surgery is 5 minutes walk from my home. The BRAT TOLD ME THAT SHE WOULD NOT BE THERE WHEN I COME BACK AS SHE SAID THAT HER MOTHER HAD TOLD HER TO LEAVE MY HOUSE, GET ON THE BUS AND AMEET HER AT THE SHOP WHERE SHE WORKS!!!!!

i was stumped as no communication had tbeen told to me about this. I asked the BRAT DID YOUR MOTHER TELL YOU TOINFORM ME OF THIS ARRAGEMENT. SHE SHOOK HER HER FROM SIDE TO SDIE TO INDICATE NO!!!!

I PHONED HER CLOSEST FRIEND TO SEEK ADVICE...SHE TOLD ME TO TELL MY PARTNER IMMEDIATELY. I DID AND HE AGREED THERE WAS DSOME ELEMENT OF BAD MANEERS PERVAILING. IF YOU LEAVE A CHILD WITH SOMEONE AND THE PARENT A CHILD COMMUNICATE VIA MOBILE PHONE FREQUENTLY AND THERE IS ANY ARRAGNEMENT FOR TE COLLECTION OF THE CHILD THE CARER SHOULD BE INFORMED.

MY PARNTER ADMITTED THAT HIS DAUGHTER WAS WRONG. HE THEN CAME BACK HOME AND COLLECTED THE BRAT. I WAS FUMING!!!!!

I APOLGISED TO MY GRANDSON AS I COULD IMAGINE THAT AS SOON AS I TURNED MY BACK, THE BRAT WOULD HAVE SAID SHE WAS GOING AND ALL HELL COULD HAVE BROKEN LOOSE..

My ppartner and I dsicussed matters later and he is a wimp when it comes to his  disrepectful children in the UK. I let rip and told him that the BRAT and HER MOTHER OWE ME AN APOLOGY FOR THIER BAD MANNERS AND UNTIL THEN I WAS DONE WITH THEM. HE THEN TOLD ME THAT HE NEVER LIKED TO LEAVE THE BRAT WITH ME...I TOLD HIM QUIETLY NOT TO ASK ME TO FOR HELP WITH HER ANYMORE.. he was stumped!!!!

I dont get involved anymore and anycare for her is down to HIM. THE APOLOGY HAS NOT COME TO DATE AND IT HAS BEEN ABOUT A MONTH NOW..THEY KEPT AWAY FROM MY HOEMFOR A WEEK BUT HAVE SLUNK BACK WITH NO APOLOGY FORTHCOMING.......IF THE DAUGHTER HAD ANY SHAME SHE WOULD NOT SHOW HER FACE BACK AT MY HOME.....

On another note, my partner's mother is back in the UK for medical treatment. I get on with her very well. Prior to this incident, she asked me how do I get on with my partner's kids. I told her that I do speak to his daughter and she does have manners to a degree but that I do not a have any sort of relationship with his eldest son and explained about the noise nuisance. I did not elaborate about the women as the noise issue was enough to not want someone around...my partner's mother is very shrewd and we both agreed that not everyone gets on with theiir parent's partner. I informed my partner's mother that as it was his 60th birthday coming up, I would NOT be going to ANY of the celebrations (on the pretext of the son being there but it was really because I don't want ANYTHING to do his kids and the BRAT in the UK).

My partner's 60th birthday was on Friday. He got his pressie from me already. He went out with his son and friends  and let slip that a group went out to Nandos. Then I saw a text message on his phone from his brother about the party. I ALREADY SAID THAT I WAS NOT GETTING INVOLVED WITH ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIS KIDS IN THE UK. They bought him a new sound mixer for his birthday but as his son is not allowed in my home the son could not come to my home to set it up. I wish him and them all the best cos I am not getting involved.

 

I told my partner that I'm sorry but I am not having anything else to do with his kids in the UK again as there has been too much disrespct from them and to a degree from HIM!!!!!! I stated that I am in a relationship with him and not his cat, dog, whatever...... I know he may not be happy about this but I think he is starting to get the gist of why I despise his kids in the UK. Recently a friend of his disrespected him in a certain way and he did not like it. I told my partner that it was his own decision what to do about the disrespectful friend but that I would have curtailed that freindship immediately based on the evidence.........

I am certain that his kids arranged the party and that I was persona non grata but when the daughter and the worthless son had their problems, they used to run directly or indirectly to me (via my partner) and try to let them stay in my home, take me and my home for a launderette, social club, doss house, dating venue, nursery, childminder and a bank.

When the BRAT comes, I go upstairs. I dont care what my partner thinks. He knows I hate his kids in the UK and the BRAT and the reasons why. They can f**k of** for all I care....

My partner has further work coming up and I am not seeing anyone on the bus or having them after school....that is one reason (on my side) why my partner and I are not married I am 57 now but In my will, I will ensure that his son, daughter and the BRAT do not benefit the fruits of my labour  I have already told him that if he was to pass away I would move and NO-ONE (meaning from his side) would know my whereabouts......

LIFE is bliss as I do not have kis kids bothering me anymore......

 

Oldfool's picture

I PHONED MY CLOSEST FRIEND TO SEEK ADVICE...SHE TOLD ME TO TELL MY PARTNER IMMEDIATELY. I DID AND HE AGREED THERE WAS SOME ELEMENT OF BAD MANNERS PERVAILING. IF YOU LEAVE A CHILD WITH SOMEONE AND THE PARENT A CHILD COMMUNICATE VIA MOBILE PHONE FREQUENTLY AND THERE IS ANY ARRANGEMENT OR CHANGE IN THE ARRANGEMENT FOR THE COLLECTION OF THE CHILD, THE CARER SHOULD BE INFORMED

2Tired4Drama's picture

If you haven't already read about disengagement, I'd encourage you to do so.  There is a separate forum section just for that.  I think what you need to do is forget about an apology as it is worthless.  Just refuse to have anything to do with SD (or her offspring) from now on.  Practice disengagement and it will make your life so much easier.  

Harry's picture

Do nothing, Do not get involved with SD child.  If she show up with Child. Have her call your DH. You can not take child to care for him. You are going someplace where you can not take him. You have time to make up some places now. 

notasm3's picture

I have completely banned SS34 and his GF from my home - even if I am not at home. Works perfectly. 

Rags's picture

With this level of manipulation even I would suggest total disengagement.

Take care of you.

Stay happy.

STaround's picture

Who the heck drops off a kid that age without cleraing with parent!   Keep house locked, tell your kids do not open door.  IMHO, you are runnning the risk that something will go wrong, sooner and later, CPS will get involved, and you will not be able to have YOUR grandkids over.  

Oldfool's picture

Thanks for your response. I have given up with my partner's daughter and her BRAT completely.....   

Goodluck's picture

I understand your position, your total frustration, total FED UP'ness....all of it.

Totally agree with STaround.

**

I have tuff skin considering everything we have gone thru and I had too much of reading the word "BRAT", I had to stop reading.

Hope everything works out the way you want it to.

GOODLUCK

 

 

StepUltimate's picture

I don't have much to add but wishing you the best. 

Oldfool's picture

Thank you for your comment. My partner informed me last night that his daughter is dropping off the BRAT this morning for him to put on the bus. That is THEIR business. I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT HIS DAUGHTER OR HER BRAT!!!!!