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Does it feel like a polygamous relationship to anyone else but me?

wicked's picture

I don't know...maybe it's just me...but it occurred to me lately that it *feels* like I am in a polygamous relationship whenever DH goes to spend time with his "other family" (his bio kids and grandkids). It pretty much makes me crazy and jealous thinking about it and I just want a "normal" family so bad and know it will never be that way. I don't blame him, it's just the way it is. But just wondering if anyone else has ever felt this way.

smileygirl's picture

LOL, I'm so glad to see someone else say this. I just said this to DH in one of those gut spilling conversations but only after I had spent atleast 20 minutes trying to come up with a different way to explain it that didn't sound so crazy. Yes, it always feels like I'm married to my Husband and his Ex. They have one family, he and I have one and then of course we have one really big messed up family that she runs with him as her proxy.

cpreston's picture

Befor we were married, but still together for years, my step-daughter would exclude even the mention of me or my kids from her quarterly "family newsletters" and then she'd mail a copy to us.
"me Dad and brother went to the beach again for vacation this summer..."
really? did you forget to mention the three other people that were on vacation with you?

it wasn't until we had been married for over a year that my name and my kids' names actually "made it" in her letters
(her excuse was that her mother's family is old fashioned and they just wouldn't have understood our living arrangements)
boo hoo

Sweetnothings's picture

Hah ! Love the confession !! What is it with the DHs secret phonecalls/ emails ?? I have and am dealing with that !! It really annoyed me that I was good enough to help emotionally support DH through all of the dramas over the years and did all I could to help the skids ( I know gimme a break it was in the early years !) but you cannot share the latest SD21 sob story and demands for money ??
Luckily the BM didn't really care about anything much, including the kids, but I would have blocked her too if she was like that!!