Collections, Repos, ditching town...
Yesterday we got a call on the house phone, ds15 answered it and yelled down the stairs to DH, "There's a man on the phone who wants to talk to ss32!" DH ended up talking to a collector who was trying to get in touch w/ss. Apparently ss32 has stopped paying his car payments, changed his phone # and has moved to evade repossession. DH was calm at first but then started yelling, "I have no idea where my son is or what his phone # is! Thanks for reminding me that my son doesn't talk to me!!!" Then DH rather forcefully hung up the phone.
Poor DH had tears welling up in his eyes and went on about how ss32 is not speaking to him and how he rarely hears from ss26/gskids either. DH talked to ss32 a few weeks ago after we got a collection notice in his name in the mail. I'm sure if DH would have offered to bail ss32 out like he's done in the past they'd be best buds right now. 7 yrs ago ss had a car that was about to be repossessed and DH swooped in, took over payments and saved the day.
I listened for a few minutes then changed the subject. We started talking about his future business opps and moving to our new location. DH then talked about people he'd miss here, the only people that came up were co-workers and two of his musician friends. No mention of skids at all, no mention of gskids either. I guess since he never sees them anyway he won't really have a chance to miss them.
I'm a little sad for DH because I know how it feels to have your kid ignore/brush you off. This happened from 12-19 years w/dd22. I dared to try to be a parent to her and she rebelled, now we are close but then not so much. DH on the other hand was *friends* when his sons were kids/teens, they partied, drank and had no responsibilities. Now that they are very grown men and DH is not rescuing and supporting them he is of no use to them and they are rebelling against him.
Good thing I'm disengaged and know I can't fix this. Not my irresponsible monkey, not my collections circus. And thank GOD DH didn't cosign for the car!!!