Hi again,

My adult DS told my 7 y.o. she would take him to a toy store for his b-day present. His b-day was a month ago. He reminded her at least twice, but she was going shopping w/ a friend once, and to the beach on another occasion.

Anyway, I told him not to ask again and he obeyed. However, the other day, she told my youngest, 3 today, "Thurs. is your b-day! I'm going to take you to Toys 'R Us so you pick out a present!" My oldest looked on. Anyway, she didn't, and I was happy that she didn't show w/ a gift tonight as my oldest would have been crushed.

This is the SD that won't move out and that I had the friction with a month ago. DH is stalling in talking to her about a 'plan' and I'm losing patience, esp. when she's been here 5.5 months, hasn't paid a bill or offered a cent our way, and now hasn't been able to even buy a little toy for her brothers' birthdays as promised.

I was really relieved that she didn't come up w/ a gift for the baby. (She treats the oldest worse than the other two so I didn't want another slight to him.) Our middle son will turn 5 next month and if I hear this promise of a toy store shopping spree, I'm going to faint. I'd love to say, "Please don't promise the boys anything like that unless you intend to go through w/ it. If you cannot, and I know you're saving $ for your own place, then just let it go. They don't expect anything until you mention that you want to take them shopping, then they're disappointed when it doesn't happen..." but I'm too unassertive.

We have been getting along fairly well since the argument as she has been more diligent w/ her laundry. But, it hurts to see your kids disappointed and at this age, they are.

Any advice on either getting DH to speak w/ her about getting a place by July 31 or about this b-day issue should she come up w/ the same junk for the middle son?

Thanks.