I accidentally saved before putting the rest in. Sorry I'm new to this site. It just irritates me. Her dad tries to tell her the truth all the time and set her straight from whatever her mom says. My SD will agree to what her dad says but today in the car her dad got off to go buy something and my SD basically just admitted to me that she just tells her dad ok so she doesnt get in trouble (shes 6). She then asked me is she was gonna get in trouble for telling me. I told her no and left it at that. I mean I understand it's not my problem but I get more upset for my boyfriend. He tries really hard and my SD seems to just give him a hard time when it comes to BM. (Which is somewhat understandable, no kid ever wants to think of one of their parents as liars) Its also weird because she takes her BMs side a lot yet says she still wants to live with both half and half? Idk. I should just let it be right? In the beginning I used to tell him when she would makes comments like that but I quickly learned over time it doesnt help much
I completely understand. My sd9 deals with her BM lying to her. It's heart breaking to watch. Watching BM tell lies and make promises she has no intention of keeping is so infuriating. She's so selfish and is willing to lie to her child to make herself feel better and stroke her own ego. She knows her mother lies, but there is a level of loyalty there where kids not only want to believe but NEED to believe that their parents are good. She is starting to see it more and more and is getting angry... it breaks my heart. I went through the same thing as a kid. I refused to believe my mother was anything less than an angel and saint and nothing was her fault... even though I was raised her foster care because of her REFUSAL to take care of her kids and her selfishness. the only thing you can do for your SD is to be honest, consistent, and always keep your word. And just be there for her to lean on for support when BM let's her down. Don't bad mouth BM, just tell her "I'm so sorry that you were lied to ( or a promise was not kept... whatever the situation is). I know that really hurt your feelings" and give her a big hug because I promise you she needs it. it may take years ,( I was an adult) before she accepts that her mother did her wrong. But she will also remember who was actually there for her.
even with the facts and evidence black and white that bio mum lied, she will still excuse it or justify it or blame someone else or clism you are lying
my husband told off sd24 how it really hurt him and was so disrespectful that she claimed he sees witch drs and does black magic against theirmum when they know and have seen with their own eyes only their mum and her family engage in this crap... its crazy but not much you can do
I accidentally saved before
I accidentally saved before putting the rest in. Sorry I'm new to this site. It just irritates me. Her dad tries to tell her the truth all the time and set her straight from whatever her mom says. My SD will agree to what her dad says but today in the car her dad got off to go buy something and my SD basically just admitted to me that she just tells her dad ok so she doesnt get in trouble (shes 6). She then asked me is she was gonna get in trouble for telling me. I told her no and left it at that. I mean I understand it's not my problem but I get more upset for my boyfriend. He tries really hard and my SD seems to just give him a hard time when it comes to BM. (Which is somewhat understandable, no kid ever wants to think of one of their parents as liars) Its also weird because she takes her BMs side a lot yet says she still wants to live with both half and half? Idk. I should just let it be right? In the beginning I used to tell him when she would makes comments like that but I quickly learned over time it doesnt help much
I completely understand. My
I completely understand. My sd9 deals with her BM lying to her. It's heart breaking to watch. Watching BM tell lies and make promises she has no intention of keeping is so infuriating. She's so selfish and is willing to lie to her child to make herself feel better and stroke her own ego.
She knows her mother lies, but there is a level of loyalty there where kids not only want to believe but NEED to believe that their parents are good. She is starting to see it more and more and is getting angry... it breaks my heart.
I went through the same thing as a kid. I refused to believe my mother was anything less than an angel and saint and nothing was her fault... even though I was raised her foster care because of her REFUSAL to take care of her kids and her selfishness.
the only thing you can do for your SD is to be honest, consistent, and always keep your word. And just be there for her to lean on for support when BM let's her down. Don't bad mouth BM, just tell her "I'm so sorry that you were lied to ( or a promise was not kept... whatever the situation is). I know that really hurt your feelings" and give her a big hug because I promise you she needs it.
it may take years ,( I was an adult) before she accepts that her mother did her wrong. But she will also remember who was actually there for her.
If she has been brainwashed by bio mum
even with the facts and evidence black and white that bio mum lied, she will still excuse it or justify it or blame someone else or clism you are lying
my husband told off sd24 how it really hurt him and was so disrespectful that she claimed he sees witch drs and does black magic against theirmum when they know and have seen with their own eyes only their mum and her family engage in this crap... its crazy but not much you can do