I may lose my mind. I have a SS that is 9 and a SD that is 6. My husband and I have a 4 year old adopted son and a 2 year old adopted daughter. For the three years of my husbands and his ex's court order - we are to get the kids every Friday night (NOT every other) between 5:30 and 6:00 - their mother is to drop them off to us. My husband is then court ordered to drive them back to her house Sunday nights between 6:00 - 6:30. My husbands ex moved an hour and a half away when they split because she "wanted to live near the beach"...
For the last two years, my stepson has been signed up for karate year round on Friday nights which starts at 5:15. So, his mother drops him off at 5:00 so he can be at karate on time. My SS is diagnosed with a high functioning learning disability and because of this tends to act aqward at some social situations with children his age. My SS is a people pleaser - he will tell the person he is with what they want to hear - so we never know what "he" is really thinking. If we asked him if he wanted to wrestle he would say no - if she asked him if he wants to do karate he would say no. My SD is a fiesty one and will tell you how it is...which is so much more refreshing in a way. Beacuse of my SS's "high functioning disabilities", my husband and I have him signed up in a LEGO social class (year round) every Saturday morning. We also have my SD signed up for gymnastics every Saturday morning. So, we have a routine and schedule EVERY weekend we have the children with us.....
Now, this wrestling season 12-13 and last wrestling season 11-12, "she" has signed my SS up for wrestling.However, every wrestling match is on either a Friday night or Saturday morning. We have constant arguring with my husbands ex as we tell her she needs to find activiities for the children that are on her parenting time...not ours. We have activities for them that they should not have to miss because she decided she wanted SS to wrestle. This season, on a Saturday my husband was working and I went to NYC with my SD for her birthday we allowed her to pick SS up Saturday morning to participate in a tournament for wrestling thinking she would be there with him - only to find out SS was at the tournament with my husbands ex's "boyfriend of the month" and then sat at her hair salon for the remainder of the day until she was finished work and brought him back to us at 8pm when the tournament was over around lunch time....She wasnt even there to surport him - so to me - it is not about SS getting to wrestle - it is about her "getting her way" ...my husband told her - that he will not wrestle anymore on his "parenting time" - as it seems it is a "game" to her to use the kids to piss him off.
Yesterday, my husband got an email from his ex stating the children would be late because tony has a match friday night. My husband responded with tony has karate and he expects the children to be dropped off at the normal time of 5:00 for karate or the police will be notified - her response...."notify who you want".
I am tired. We are tired of spending money on attorneys. Advise? Anyone?What do we do? Let him wrestle? Stand our grounds.