You are here

Discovery-Will we be asked for communication between me/DH

Biostep7777's picture
Forums: 

So we are doing discovery. Asking all sorts of invasive stuff. Lol!! Which we expected and fine with most of it. The part I am worried about is communication between myself and DH. I mean not only the large amount of sexing....HAHAHAHA!! But we talk about very confidential things about my own kids, their medication or therapy, my oldest went through a very bad bout of depression and you know.... just SUPER private intimate things about myself and my kids I absolutely do not want HCBM to see. Not to mention the things we vent and say about her are not exactly kind. Lol!! I'm sure she said terrible things about us too which of course she does! She can't stand us and we can't stand her do naturally there's snack talk. Big deal! So, will they ask for communication between DH and I??  They are going to court for custody/child support so not sure it would be anything they would need for court (like...what would DH and I be talking about that has anything to do with his custody/child suppprr) we are very happy to disclose any health, therapy, communication between us and the stepkids but I DO NOT want to share anything that has to do with my kids for their privacy. 

CastleJJ's picture

What do you mean by discovery? Like you have to go through a deposition? Or is it an evaluation by an FOC worker? 

tog redux's picture

You do NOT have to provide everything they ask for in discovery and it would be inappropriate for her to ask that. Work with your  attorney on this stuff. Some things are required (financial Info) and other stuff is not. You are not a party in this case, don't release anything pertaining to you unless it's part of the financial stuff, ie joint tax returns. 

Biostep7777's picture

Ok thank you! So, they can't ask DH (who is a part of the litigation) for texts/emails between us? I do NOT want her to have any info on my kids. Where they go to school, where they hang out, what their medical procedures are ect... obviously I share this info with DH and we talk on text about stuff. I want to be as invisible as I possibly can with her. She's CRAZY and hates my kids snd myself. 

ndc's picture

They can ask, but that doesn't mean you'll need to produce it.  That's something your lawyer would object to and get thrown out.  Some people ask for everything and the kitchen sink in discovery, if only to cost you time and expense.  A good lawyer will get such a ridiculous discovery request limited to what is relevant.  All of the texts between you and DH aren't relevant.

tog redux's picture

Yes, as ndc said, they can ask whatever they want. You don't have to produce that information, it's not relevant to the case. The judge won't care what husband and wife say to each other.

simifan's picture

They can ask for anything, but you do not have to provide anything they ask for unless ordered to by a judge. Even joint returns, you can redact anything with your information on it. Steps are not a party to the case. 

Rags's picture

No, it is highly unlikely that they will ask for private communication between you and DH.  If you provide print outs of toxic crap from BM, that will work.  But do not give those to opposition. Roll it out in court.  Hopefully you have not provided her with examples of you and DH being toxic towards her. If BM's attorney requests your personal conversations, ignore that request.  

We kept everything. We recorded every call from the SpermClan, every call when DW called them (legal in Texas to recored your own conversations without informing any other party to the conversation that they are being recorded,  kept every rant V-mail from SpermGrandHag, journaled every story SS told about toxic SpermClan bullshit during SpermLand visitation, and we took it to court.  Watching them squirm when they accused us of lying about conversations or their answering machine rants the playing their recorded voices for the Judge was always fun.

They repeatedly requested my financial information and I would refuse to provide it. They would request that I be excluded from the court room and from the case. The Judge always ordered that I be excluded.  Once the Judge would exclude me, would refuse to provide my financial information since I was not a party to the case, neither was my money. Then there would be a tit for tat between the Judge and I where they would demand my financial information and I would refuse by informing the Judge that since I was excluded to provide my financial and income information would violate their ruling.  I would push it just as far as I could and when they would would tell me not to say another word, I would zip my lip. I would remain silent when they would again requiest my income and financial information.  At that point I would give them the " are really that big of an idiot look" at which point they would get really pissed off.  When they threatened contempt I would provide the bare minimum information on my investments and income.   I made it clear that there was no logic in excluding me from the case then demanding my personal financial and income information.  

They really loved it when I took out full page adds in their local paper outlining their idiot decisions.  Our attorney would call me begging to not publish the information. The Judge had a relative at the paper who called to inform about my add.   I used this to force the Judge to recuse themselves from future court actions between us and the SpermClan.

Flooding the opposition with information is not an uncommon tactic.  

Unless specifically demanded by the court, you don't have to provide it.

Leave the opposition hanging as much as possible and gum up their efforts as much as possible.  It can work.

Discovery was always interesting.  We would provide everything the court asked for, the Spermidiot would give only his last two pay checks and then spout bullshit about the rest of the information requested by the courts.  My DW would provide the courts with the results of her research on the Spermidiot and the SpermClan which always spun them up since they had no intention of their crap being rolled out in front of the courts.  They repeatedly tried to convince the court that we had stoleny their information though everything we presented on them was either direct evidence or public information.

They hated that and would claim victimhood.  We had fun rubbing their noses in the stinky spots of their life's carpet.