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Child support without court ruling about custody

hellokitty123's picture

My boyfriend has his son from another woman who he wasn't married to and they live in different states. My question is how/whether we can collect child support from her because their arrangement didn't involve courts and mother doesn't want or care to have him back even just to visit. Any advice is appreciated 

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

She is not legally required to pay you guys anything without a court order. You will need to speak to a lawyer.

notarelative's picture

Boyfriend needs to consult a lawyer. He needs to get custody ordered by court. Laws are different in different places, but here, if they weren't married, the birth mom is automatically the custodial parent. If bio mom suddenly decided she wanted custody, she might be able to show up and take it. 

Prior non interest may not predict continued non interest, when birth mom realizes you are in the picture.

SteppedOut's picture

I suggest you contact an attorney, if you are able. I tried child support via state child support office and it was a JOKE. If you are able to wait and hire an attorney, do that. If you need at least some help asap, use CS. 

Rags's picture

As others have said... the BM in out of wedlock child situations generally will get full custody unless otherwise ordered by the court.  It is rare that this is not the case and the BioDads in these situations are screwed.

That was the case in our situation.  My bride was a single teen mom and was awarded full physical and legal custody as soon as she filed for a ruling of paternity and CS against the SpermIdiot when he started cheating on her.  He was screwed from that moment on and she had him by the short and curlies for the next 17+ years.  That of course does not relieve him of being a waste of skin POS dirtbag from a very shallow and polluted gene pool... however... he was screwed none the less.

Your SO needs to get  his situation confirmed by CO so that the BM can't take the kid later if she is so inclined. Particularly if the intent is to nail BM for CS.