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BM killing us with the Back and Forth Letters

motherof_2plus1's picture
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Crazy BM is ONLY responding through her lawyer. When FDH tries to reach out to her to see when he can see his BD its always "i have to talk to my lawyer' "I'll get my lawyer to talk to yours".

She is trying to wring us dry in hopes we run out of money and in turn she gets what she wants. She isn't paying for hers as she has been appointed a legal aide lawyer.

I have heard from some that there is some recourse for this... possibly having her responsible for paying for these ridiculous requests/demands. Its one thing after another. One letter she is asking that we don't take the child outside of our area for vacation/trips. We replied sure of course, we will keep the child here assuming you do the same. She responds back with a letter saying oh but i need to be able to take her due to my families vacation home. ITs becoming redundant and looks like wont ever end :?

Is this something we should bring up with the lawyer? Or is it too early for that?
We were officially served papers end of June and its been letters and letters ever since.

Rags's picture

Time to drag her ass to court instead of playing the games. On the vacation thing. Your response that you will agree if she also agrees was perfect.

Keep drawing the noose tighter around her neck while letting her hang herself. The judge is going to love her crap when you get her to court. }:)

motherof_2plus1's picture

Thanks! We go to court end of Aug but i'm not sure what will even come of that. I believe its to just arrange a specific custody arrangement because of all her bullsht and withholding the child hostage. I have a feeling this is only the beginning. How many times in court until something like this is ACTUALLY finalized??

BTW i LOVE your advise and responses! Super helpful and encouraging. Smile

motherof_2plus1's picture

Nobody has custody as there is currently NO court order which is why this is going to court. I wasn't served as I'm not the BM, i have no part in this.

First papers were to gain full custody, now as time goes on she is wanting to relocate, wants child's Passport that FDH currently has, wants us not to be able to travel with child but she wants to be able to.

Dontfeedthetrolls's picture

Go to court and demand that reasonable communication go through email or a court appointed app.

Forcing it to go through lawyers is insane and shows her inability to coparent in an acceptable manor.

Lawyers should be for extreme things. It hey we want to take the kid to the zoo 2 hours away.

BethAnne's picture

If you didn't have a lawyer who would her lawyer contact? Perhaps taking your lawyer off the case until you need legal advise would save you money and if her motivation is to try to make you run out of money then it might dissuade her from going that route.

motherof_2plus1's picture

He responds because he wants to see his daughter and she is holding her hostage until he jumps through all these hoops. To me... that's not part of the problem. Its a father desperate to see his child.

Like I said we are waiting on court and hopefully gain some access to the child then. We wont be responding further.

motherof_2plus1's picture

She is completely unable to co-parent and she has proven that time and time again. Our lawyer says no further correspondence until court. The only reason we have been responding thus far is her constant refusal to let the child see her dad which has broken FDH right down. Hoping if we respond to her requests she will let up a bit.

She clearly has no intent on providing any parenting time with him as when he responds to her letters he gets another one right away. We will have to wait it out until end of Aug and hope that the judge comes down hard.

curiouslikeacat's picture

Oh Judges don't like games. Keep every bit of conversation and save it. Get a lawyer and let the bmom hang herself. Its one thing to be a parent and want to kids all to yourself etc, its another when you screw around with people and judges can smell that a mile away.