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another bad drug screen for BM, court next week, need advise!

starfish1012's picture
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Background info:
-SS8 has been in my household since he was 2.
-BM’s custody revoked by the state after endangerment and neglect charges when SS was 2.
-BM has not regained any custody, but has worked up to Every Other Week visitation and pays the minimum in Child Support.
-BM has had several contaminated or dilute drug screens and does not put her child first in her life choices.
-Judge said that if there was one more incident, they would put her back on supervised visitation only indefinitely.
-Last week, dilute drug screen and we have court next week.
-When notified of this, BM said she would be requesting a “Change of Venue” and texted DH a lot about how the judge is so unfair and she has no idea how the screen could be dilute. She has said this kind of thing before, but her old PO always debunks it.

So, my DH is ready to go and hold the judge to what she said last time. And I feel like I want to stick it to BM as well as keeping SS safe. But supervised visits are so awful at the place they made us go awhile back. Has anyone had experience with doing them yourself?
And in regards to CS, would it be unreasonable to make her pay more to compensate us for the cost of summer camp now that we may need to send him EVERY week instead of EOW?
Any other thoughts?

starfish1012's picture

Previous supervised visits were at a some place where that's all they do. It was really awkward and the supervisor sits behind one-way glass to watch and take notes. It was very expensive for BM.

The Y would be a great option. I'll call and see.

Family won't work. She has burned those bridges.

Would it be ridiculous to offer to "supervise" myself at a park or something? I can't decide if it's worth mentioning or not. DH thinks it's a bad idea.

Rags's picture

When the judge revokes her EOW and puts her back on indefinite supervised visitation immediately request an amendment of CS since BM will no longer have the child 50% of the time.

That should help cover the increased daycare costs to you.

As for what to do ... fry BMs idiot ass and get her the hell out of your SDs life as much as possible.

The kid needs protection from her BM and her dad and you are the ones to carry that banner.

IMHO of course.

Good luck.