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When your SO gets a raise at work

Thisisnotus's picture

does BM usually ask for more money in CS?

My DH just got a promotion and a substantial pay increase and I'm kinda waiting for BM to get wind of it and ask him for more money. The last promotion and raise came just a few days before they signed their agreement with the lawyers so BM did have the CS altered last minute because of that.

I am just wondering what will go down. She lied on her financial statements in court and did not even bring her finanical documents of any kind to court....DH let it go b/c he just wanted a divorce.

Basically BM used her part time hourly wage to calculate CS, she works full time now, but she also gets 10's of thousands of dollars in bonuses, an $800 car allowance and has 2 rental properties bringing in income (DH let her keep those).

I think honestly, it would benefit DH to let her take him back to court and have her produce her actual income.

I'm not going to say much about it unless DH actually considers giving her more money or if he doesn't fight her if she takes him back to court. As it is, he pays CS, cares for the kids half the time and buys way more than half of their clothes and other items they need or want. He also covers half of all medical, he pays most school fees....half of after school care of summer camps...you name it...he pays.

Thoughts and/or experiences?

 

hereiam's picture

My DH never let BM know anything about his job or his money.

When she finally tried to have CS modified, little did she know he had been laid off, so....

It sounds like your DH pays plenty so I wouldn't volunteer anything.

tog redux's picture

How would she know he got a raise? Please don't tell me he would let her or the skids know.  Around here, CS can only be reviewed every 3 years or if their pay goes up 15%.  And if she seeks an increase, then she will have to bring her documents as well (here anyway). 

Thisisnotus's picture

She will know because of his job it will be a public announcement that he has a new title. It’s not something he could keep to himself.

his pay goes up 25 percent ish

 

tog redux's picture

What are the laws in your state? Certainly don't do anything until/unless she files for a modification.

Rags's picture

Only if she knows about it. In most jurisdictions CS can only be modified no less than every two years unless there is a significant change in circumstance. Generally a raise for the NCP is not a significant change in circumstance.  Winning the $500Mil powerball lottery for example... would be a major change in circumstance.

If he does not tell her of the raise she likely would likely not ever know.  If she does file for a CS review... he needs to dig up all of her financial dirt so that it can be considered by the courts.

Though I am married to the CP in our blended family adventure I recognize that NCPs often are screwed repeatedly.  TMI is a thing and definately a concern in the blended family world.  Hopefully your DH recognizes that loose lips sink ships and this is a TMI event that he does not have to share with BM.

Our CO stipulated that either party could notify the courts of changes in financial condition. It did not stipulate that either party had to notify the courts of a change in financial condition.  We only initiated a CS review when my income significantly declined during a RIF event in my industry.   We never notified the courts of increases in DW's or my income and the SpermClan never requested a CS review though they did try for custody.   They learned that though my DW's income far outpaced the Spermidiot's any review of CS resulted in an increase in CS.  They never figured out why but they did figure out that it was always painful for them regarding CS if they forced our hand to take them to court or if they initiated a court action.  The income shares model CS calculation formulas will nearly always raise CS even if the CP significantly out earns the NCP.  The NCP is repsonsible for a % of the cost of supporting the kid(s) even when their parenting time and income may be significnatly lower than the CPs.

This inherrent bias is a signficant part of why NCPs generally get screwed in family court regarding CS. 

 

 

 

lieutenant_dad's picture

I'd put everything you know about all the incomes into the CS calculator and see what the damage is. If he would owe her more than $200 more per month, I'd maybe run it by an attorney to see if it could bite him later. If it's less than $200, I'd likely keep mum unless she takes him back.

Anything your DH does needs to be done to protect him, especially if you know he is overpaying because she is underreporting her income. A quick consultation with an attorney will give you more clarity.

Thisisnotus's picture

I put everything in with his raise and what BM actually makes (which was a low ball estimate) and it shows him over paying right now by 100.

BM did not originally account for the cost he pays for health insurance and now we have a child so without his raise as it stands he is overpayIng by 300.

CLove's picture

I often wonder this myself.

DH got a raise RIGHT before the CS filing by Toxic Troll. He supplied a paystub and she did. He also wrote down what I was making on unemployment last year. She filed RIGHT after we got married too.

NOW things are so different. Im working full time, making triple and DH is hopefully getting a raise, plus Toxic Troll lost her job and is living on her workmans comp claim money, alimony as well as child support. Plus she does side gigs cleaning and selling makeup/suppliments through some multi-level marketing thing.

I know that MY income isnt counted and I can refuse to supply the data. I suspect when Toxic Trolls money starts running out, and she still doesnt have a full-time job with benefits, that she will re-file. I keep warning DH that she will come after him again...

Its going to be a long 5 years.

Notup4it's picture

This is why I tell DH not to bother going for promotions, etc..  With any promotion there comes more responsibility, stress and often less time at home.... which takes away from our family time with little actual benefit to our household.  It can be like doubling responsibility but then only reaping half the reward just to benefit another household- nope.