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what a moron...

epgr's picture

ok so after skids living here for 10 yrs they are going to live with their mom.. for several reasons... right or wrong it is what it is.
Anyways all summer long they have been at BMs house, they come here every other week Sun-Thurs. all summer long she has picked them up at 4pm.. that is until yesterday, finally at almost 5 I text her myself, instead of having DH do it.. I say "When are you picking your kids up?", she comes back with "today I thought"... ahh I forget who I am dealing with.. I say "ok then do you think you can tell me a time" she says "or I can wait till tomorrow if you want".. this pisses me off because I have been sick, I had a drs. appt at 4:30, I miss it because I dont know where she is, and we dont need another bullshit contempt charge, and I dont feel good I dont want to take 4 kids to the drs.. its an appt not a field trip..we have to pay for the lawyer ourselves, we dont have our entire family doing it for us.
ok so I call DH, I am like she is a moron you need to call her and find out whats going on.. DH calls her and says its been 4 all summer what makes you think it is different today? told her I missed an appt. and have been sick.. she says she didnt know.. and for things like that just tell her and she will make sure she is here on time.. wtf is that???? I mean seriously... ugh!!! Now I have to report to her what I am doing.. screw her.. I texted her and told her from now on if she is more than 15 mins late I was leaving.. and she would have to make arrangements with DH to get the kids cuz I am not going to be used by her, andmy life does not revolve around her and her ability and want to be a parent to her kids... wow sounds so much nicer on here than it did to her.. lol..
Skids even said "if you would have told her she probably would have been here on time" I told them that I am a big girl and I dont need to report to anyone,least of all their mother.. and that she should be here at 4 cuz thats what time their parents agreed on...
ok maybe its petty and stupid.. but I am very sick and missed the drs. appt..I planned accordingly, she should too.. I think its bullshit that we couldnt get ahold of the lawyer to find out what to do when she was not here on time, so I had to miss my appt... DH would have come home but he works far enough away that I still would have missed that appt.. BM texted at 5 and said she was on her way.. showed up at almost 7.. she only lives less than an hour away..
sooo do you report to BM what you are doing??

epgr's picture

ok..since we are in the process of getting papers drawn up so they can live with her.. can someone give me an idea what can be put as a consequence??
She will drop them off 1/2 hour early, come get them hours late.. and since the papers are being drawn up now for them to live with her.. getting ideas for consequences for crap like this would be great.

Stepdown.. we document everything, and I mean every little thing.. we have learned with her we have to. You would think that she would have to make other arrangements to have them picked up.. or did I forget to mention she is special and my soul purpose in life is to bow down to her every command, after all SHE has his first son anddaughter.. some one should probably drop rose petals at her feet..she has actually said before that what time she gets here is no big deal cuz I dont have a "real job"

epgr's picture

yeah there is A LOT more to the story, she didnt know it was me texting, she thought it was DH.. and this is the most communication she has had in 10 yrs..she is constantly preoccupied. She told dh she thought it was him texting her from my phone,(yeah thats never happened before) so she didnt know it was me.
She is not friendly, or willing to work with us.. if she knows something has to do with me she will purposely NOT be ontime or come at all.. without fail every single time she was asked to get the kids on time because I had an appt, I had to take my kids to an appt, or whatever reason she wouldnt show or would show 2-3 hours late. You should have seen how she screwed up her supervised visitation..with the same passive aggressive excuses. She has always used me as her free sitter when she is preoccupied.. and I am not having it.
Believe me if she had a brain in her head she would have known it was me texting her.. not DH..she wouldnt have anything nice to say.. last time she spoke to me she stood in MY doorway yelling how she was gonna kick my ass..sometimes I get angry cuz I am mature enough not to take her out in front of all the kids..
She had her parents pick them up at 4.. thats why it has not been an issue, her parents were on time.
There is a pattern with her, right now she thinks we have to bow down to her, she thinks since her sister forced her into fighting for custody and slapping bullshit contempt charges on DH we are running scared and she is in control of it all..

Dh will not meet her 1/2 way anymore.. he has tried that, it ends up with him always going the full distance because she sold her car, it broke down, the tires are bad, her other kid is sleeping.. the list goes on and on... he has tried to be agreeable and met her up to 4-5 hours away every week (week on week off)to get there and have her demand gas money cuz she didnt have enough to get back, drove all the way there, 8 hour, when she claimed her car broke down only to watch her drive away after us, our lawyer said she is the one who chose to move over an hour away, we have never moved, she can come get them and drop them off.

Although I do like the idea of saying if she is more than 15 mins late dont bother till the next day.. they will be in a new school district living with her so she will have to be here by 7 amto get the Monday if she is late Sunday.. its not like we wont be reasonable, but its always good to have a back up..