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What did SO friends/family do that was kinda dumb?

Cookieboom's picture

I was just thinking about this and I don't know here goes...what was the one thing that SO family/friends did that raised your eyebrow? Here's my story..

I just started dating BF.   He was divorced from BF about 3 years.  He took me to his town's founders' day. He met a man from town and introduced us.  The man's wife came along and man said, "Hey (name) remember (BF)?  BM's husband?"  

BF didn't say anything, neither did I.  I was floored....kept my mouth shut.  Like WTF!

thiscantbenormal's picture

DH's brother said my baby daughter was half DH and half BM. It was a slip up but still. And DH's mom would insist my daughter looked identical to the SD's even though they take after BM. One of DH's aunts acted like she didn't know our daughter was in fact our daughter,  like she didn't know which parents this child belonged to at a family lunch get together even though she had seen her before.  DH's friends don't really know who I am. I think their lives are different now, so the couple hang outs him and BM did with them don't happen with us.

shamds's picture

Out of all of hubbys 5 kids, our 2 look the closest to hubby in looks and personality. My kids are Eurasian while hubby and exwife are 100% asian.

it's pathetic hearing my sd's claim youngest sd also had blonde hair, fair white skin and curly hair when young just so they can compare themselves to my kids when they're 100% dark brown skinned asian people.

But their mum has always had to show how upper class and better she is compared to others. Now sd's can brag they're related to white people and shove it in bio mums familys face despite the fact we have no relationship with them at all. 

i just refused to tolerate this bullshit and removed me and my the 1 & 2yr old kids from being anywhere near them. I made it very clear to hubby that my kids would not be around fakes and used as manipulative pawns so sd's looked or appeared better than they really were

Elea's picture

When DH and I are out and about, obviously as a couple, I have noticed that people he knew from when he was married to BM will come up to him and carry on an entire conversation without introducing themselves to me, much less acknowledging that I exist, unless I introduce myself or he introduces me to them. Maybe it's a West Coast thing? I am pretty certain that where I was raised that would be considered extremely rude. 

thiscantbenormal's picture

Did he also go on and on about his divorce/custody battle when he would catch up with friends?   Mine did that for a long time. Ignore my new wife over here so I can just talk about the ex wife.  This part of his life dominates everything. Like there is no room to make positive new memories together because that is a looming dark cloud that is always present. And everything has to be about his past and its like mine is invisible. I guess it's like I'm somewhere in his world. There is no him being in my world or an our world.

Elea's picture

Shok Oh dear Lord No! He doesn't talk about her to anyone other than to occasionally call out what a b*tvh she was with family. I would have lost my ever loving sh*t if he had gone on about her with community friends. He will bring up SD's latest happenings which can be boring but they are his little devils so I understand even if I am not particularly interested in the subject matter. Fortunately DH is the type to cut ties and move on. He doesn't hold grudges which is nice. He can be a bit in denial and that can be irritating. 

SteppedOut's picture

I totally get what you mean - "I guess it's like I am somewhere in his world. There is no him in my world or an our world."

My formerSO was like this.... like my sole existence was "for his world" and he didn't even want to consider a world for me existed prior to our relationship? To the end of the relationship, he would actually get mad when he had to recognize I had an existence before. It was weird and tbh pissed me off. 

stepmomnorth's picture

I walked into a party and a man there didn't know that my partner had split from his ex a couple of years ago and this man was totally pissed at seeing us together, me instead of BM with partner, and he made several rude remarks to me and him, lol. Not sure why it mattered or why he was mad, lol. Ahhh people.

Edit : funny side note, this man's nickname from high school, which he still goes by, is Tater. Not related to the story, but funny nickname for a grown man. :) 

Noway2b1's picture

His ex found out and called him to discuss the amount of property we should buy to build our new home on, so that "the kids have a place to garden and be self sufficient " the "kids" were late 30's early 40's -.- 

Elea's picture

Bah haha, some of these stories explain why the BM is the ex. DH and I are looking for a small house with no room for adult "kids."

shamds's picture

Is besties with batshit crazy affair whore exwife, called her to say "they got married, lets see how long this marriage lasts, that my husband hadn't learned"

that hoe cane to our reception the next day pretending to be friends etc, posed for family pics.

she even was dumb enough to brag to my husbands sisters about it which resulted in the sisters telling my husband about it just to warn him incase batshit crazy exwife caused a real shitshow.

what it all was is that sil and exwife are miserable old unattractive horrible fuc*kers who just can't stand somebody finally found happiness and all the mean shit they said the past almost 2 decades backfired on them. Sil hates the fact she never got along with husbands family as she was cheating on hubbys brother whilst he was engaged to another woman. 

my husband told his mum because they don't come from a family of cheaters and when you're engaged to be married in a few weeks, you should not be actively cheating. My late mil gave her son an ultimatum to pick his fiance or end the engagement, he chose the fat slob cheating whore.

She's pissed along with exwife that i slotted into familt so easily and everyone so welcoming while almost 30 yrs on, nobody likes bio mum or that sil still.

1 week after hubby married exwife, she asked for a divorce because he would give her more wedding gifts and money as her family wanted to extort him.

we been married for 7 plus years and always talking about the future and plans and adjusting it. Exwife however spent year 9 of her marriage to affair guy having sd23 tell my husband how bio mums marriage was gonna end like my husband was meant to have sympathy and concern for it. 

she could be kicked to the streets by her current husband and my husband wouldn't give a crap. If sd's harassed hubby to give money or roof for her to stay somewhere, he'd say "not my problem"

CLove's picture

To Husbands mothers vigil where she lay on deathbed, and Subsequently she was asked  to not return. She had thought she was welcomed somehow.

Rags's picture

My IL clan makes shit up about things that never happened.

"Remember when Daddy backed (Rags) against the wall and threatened to kill him if he ever hit (DW) when we were all standing there before we went to dinner?"  Umm, nope, that is complete horse shit. Never happened. He never even brought it up either with others present or between the two of us.

The younger ones also tell stories about deceased family members that they never met like they were there when that deceased family member did whatever they did.

"Hey, remember when Grampa Henry fell through the dry wall ceiling from the attic when he was building the farm house and how much fun we used to have at family gatherings with GP Henry and GM Gertrude?"  The person spouting this crap was often not even born when the people in the story were alive.

It is odd.  It is like the young ones feel left out of events that occurred in prior generations before they were even spawned.