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'Twas the meh before Christmas, an interactive thread (aka how are YOU)

AgedOut's picture

'Twas the meh before Christmas and all through this site, not a Skid was happy, they wanted to fight ... our bios were sitting overshadowed again, while the disney parents ignored them to let the skiddos reign. 



that's all I've got. My poetry won't be bringing publishers to me door. 


SO... how are you? You you, not you and the family, you and the spouse, or you and the ex. How are you doing right now? Feeling put upon or left out or just plain pissed off? What has you giddy or angry or feeling a bit off? 

How. Are. YOU?????



classyNJ's picture

AgedOut for always checking in on us.  

How are YOU?

I am trying to get into the Christmas spirit.  Even changed my everyday horror movies to the damn Hallmark channel. LOL I am REALLY trying!

It's been a week since our beloved fur baby passed.  I am used to him laying behind my office chair all day while I work and cooking for him every 2 hours.  I am trying to find a new routine and bring my kitty in here to lay on the couch but he is not having it.

Feeling a little rushed with the holiday.  We are doing Christmas this Sunday since SS's and GF's are going on a cruise and will not be home. Of course I put it upon myself to have the entire house decorated, cookies made and displayed and a full dinner.

I will get thru this, I will get thru this LOL

advice.only2's picture

I am so sorry for your loss, it's so hard when they leave.  Our fur baby passed on Christmas day many years ago, it was beyond devastating.   

AlmostGone834's picture

I'm so sorry to hear about your fur baby. One of the hardest parts for me when I lost my cat over the summer was the change in routine (I was basically his caregiver 24/7). It's so hard.

AgedOut's picture

you will get through this but remember, no one is going to remember those tiny things you'll forget. Or it will be a great story in the future. 

I'm so sorry about your furbuddy. It's so painful to lose a member of the family. 

MorningMia's picture

I like your poem. Well, not the true content, but it's good and, sadly, accurate. 

I'm very good here. It took years to get to this place. We have benefited from having geographical distance between us, but even if we were in the same town, it wouldn't matter, as they are part of the MommyCult and must show loyalty and devotion to Mommy at all times (this, I'm sure, is why SS, in his 30s, has never had a longterm romantic relationship). 

They spent only one holiday with us in 18 years, and it was by pure necessity (long story) and a complete awful disaster, after which time I told DH they were not to step foot in our house again (they did, but the times have been few and far between). 

We hang out with my family. They aren't toxic animals and they have boundaries. Then the skids give DH the third degree and act jealous that he wasn't pining for them. 

AgedOut's picture

sounds like you're better off w/out them sharing your Christmas festivities. That's on them not you. Can't take their jealousy seriously when they can't bother to show up anyway. I'd answer (if I were your DH) all jealousy comments with "you could've been a part of it. you chose not to"

advice.only2's picture

I’m goodish I guess.  Work is busy I’m the only person doing what I do for a whole program and the work just keeps flowing in, yet I keep being told I need to show I’m more “dynamic” for a promotion.  I guess doing the jobs of four different people isn’t dynamic enough in today’s work force…yet people say “nobody wants to work hard anymore”.  Well I do work hard and am not compensated for it so yeah what’s my incentive again?

My brother is hosting a family holiday this year and my SIL let me know she is well stocked on wine, liquor and weed.  I can’t participate in the weed part but man am I going to give my liver a bit of a work out.  Image 4 days trapped in a house with my parents and my aunt who all they do is bicker and complain.  On top of four young adults/teens who are glued to their phones and don’t want to go anywhere or do anything.  Coupled with DH who will be overly showy for the family and acting like he is husband of the year.

As for me well I have taken up a hobby I never thought I would find enjoyable yet here I am.  I have started running and now I am up to 2.5 miles a day and working on getting a faster pace so I can do 3 miles in 35 minutes.  I know not spectacular but it’s spectacular for me seeing as a few months ago I was barely working out, lugging around a perimenopause belly and my BP was high even with medicine.  I have even joined some virtual challenges and have knocked out a 50 miler, a 12k and will be finishing up a 98 miler here this week all since end of October.  Sorry this was so long lol.

AgedOut's picture

I'm impressed. Not just by your work load but also w/ your running. That takes stamina and grit!!

Aniki-Moderator's picture

Thank you for posting, AgedOut! I should dust off some of my Christmas rewrites. *biggrin*  Hope you're doing well!

I feel like a stress yo-yo. I love my full-time job and am very good at what I do. But the constant "emergencies" are damn annoying; especially since I'm up to my ears with multiple tasks that require my undivided attention. Interruptions mean I need time to get back my focus. Ugh.

I have a part-time job. I enjoy helping the customers. What's really flattering is that the kids (teenagers) look up to me and often ask my advice. I've turned into the store "mom" LOL! But management is a PITA...

We skipped out on family Thanksgivings, ordered a fully cooked meal, and stayed home. It was so wonderful, DH wants to do it again next year! LOL! While things are going well in steplife, my siblings are all on my shizzit list. Evil Aniki is soooo pleased that the holiday celebration with the skids is the same time my brother is hosting so we won't be going to his house. *yahoo*

Best of all, DH and I are doing great. It's like being on a honeymoon.

AgedOut's picture

I love your Thanksgiving plan. I trimmed out all the extras and now just do the basics. Kids aren't complaining and the Mr doesn't know where we keep the pans so he's happy if I'm happy. 


Awwww man on skipping the sibling fight club. Why put yourself through it? Better to just spend your time being happy. 


Aniki-Moderator's picture

I'm ecstatic we'll be missing the sibling fight club! I'm the youngest and my siblings continue to act like I'm 10yo and too dumb to know anything. It's tiring and somewhat irksome, to say the least. And we had so much fun celebrating at SD30 and fam's house last year that we're truly looking forward to this year. The grand-skids were banished to their rooms or to watch movies in the den while we adults played Cards Against Humanity. We all had stomachaches from laughing so hard!

Cover1W's picture

Doing OK. Getting through the darkest (literally) phase of winter where it's gloomy all day. I do take vita D every day and that helps.

Taking a couple days off work to kick start holiday things. Shopping tomorrow, DH said he wants to go with me which was surprising but he's also making up for his sh*t attitude last year I know...but I'll take it. Then baking on Friday.

Ill get a couple days off around the holidays too, my manager is freaking at making sure I do that beause I've been doing more than my job for over a year, but the end is in sight with training the newbies.

I'm likely going to visit my family in January,  my dad is having surgery which he needs, and the we get a shortish trip to CA in March. All these are carefully coordinated because my elderly, but doing well and happy with the proper medical care daily, cat. It worries me to travel.

YSD will be here for her short 1.5 day monthly visit. We'll probably put up the tree (they will) and get out the decor. DH and I are planning to go to our town and hang out for the day too. YSD is invited but probably won't go because she doesn't ever do anything social. Bully for us!

AgedOut's picture

She can't bitch about being left out if she declines to go with. Sounds like you get the better deal with her staying home. 

Dogmom1321's picture

What a poignant and accurate poem! I'm doing fairly well. Holidays have always been stressful with SD13 because of uncertain plans and just a gloominess in general with her presence. 

Positives so far: DH has continued to do things with DS3 even if SD is being a party pooper. Which hasn't always been the case with him. We went and got a tree just ourselves after SD13 declined & excluded herself to her room. Hope this trend continues throughout the holidays.

Hope you are well!

AgedOut's picture

I'm glad your DH is realizing that he shouldn't miss out on your son's happiness just because his daughter choses to be a hermit. Good on him, and good on you. Make a big deal of all the fun and festivities 3 is such a great age!!

AlmostGone834's picture

I love the Christmas poetry! Someone posted a version of 'Twas the Night Before Christmas years ago and I can't remember much of it but I was dying laughing while reading it. All I remember is that at the end I think Santa flew off basically saying "you're a stepmom, you're screwed" or that. 

Anyway, please join in and tell us how YOU are doing. I've got a countdown calendar for December 29th - the day Little Idiot leaves. I'm just hoping her situation hasn't reached a breaking point where she tries to con her dad into bailing her out. I'm just dreading the holiday. 


AgedOut's picture

Lidiiot will be gone before you know it. Just keep singing those Christmas tunes... Lidiot got run over by a reindeer ....fa la la la la la la!

AgedOut's picture

ok. me. I got nothing. 

we had the usual crew for turkey day. My two and their wives, my SS and his fiance, and my brother. Food, fun, and just low key which they all like so it's easy peasy. We'll do a redo for Christmas. They all come over for breakfast. Egg casserole, potatos like the Cracker Barrel Hash Brown casserole, fruit, cinnamon buns and that's it because this mom stopped making the stuff no one was really doing more than picking at. SS and fiance will not be here, her folks first Christmas in Florida so they're headed that way. 

This year we discontinued gifts. Instead we're using a secret santa web site and now we each buy for only one person. Much cheaper for us that's for sure and my brother is even participating.

My granddaughter, of course gets gifts galore. She's 15 now. She came over on Sunday w/ son #two and his wife and SS and fiance. We did a craft and decorated cut outs. Her dad is son #1 but he hasn't seen her in way too many years so we do things with her seperately. It's weird but it works and her mom is super awesome (awesome w/ a cape) and lets the rest of us into her life 24/7. 


Me? Meh meh meh. meh meh meh. meh meh all the way mehmehmeh.. I've got a bad hip and will see the ortho/surgeon next week. It's really affected us. I know the hip joint has deteriorated and that it won't get better but the way health insurance is now I may be looking at therapy (useless) and injections (might help but only for short term) or surgery (which I am petrified of but this sucks so let's do that shit). We are walkers. A fun day for us would be a State Park or walking across the bridge to Canada to see Niagara Falls from their side. (yup, that bridge, the one from the news). We hike, walk, do cemetery tours, we are on our feet all the time but since June I'm the little engine that can't. Hell I cry trying to lift my leg into the van to go to the grocery store. So that's us. Gimpy and Grumpy. 

Rags's picture

I hope that  you can get a bionic hip and get back to cranking out the miles.  My mom had both knees replaced about 10yrs ago.  Since then, she had been back to being the Energizer Bunny.

I pray the same for you.

AgedOut's picture

it really was. We had been there the weekend before, I attempted the walk across which we usually do once a month just because we can. I was doing god knows what the day of the crash and my SIL texted me to check the news. Later I saw the car as it sped before it flipped. When I saw it go airborn I knew no one survived from in the car. Luckily it didn't have a higher death toll.


if I knew how to post a pic here, you'd be looking at one I took our last time across. . 

advice.only2's picture

So sorry to hear about your hip, but let me tell you once they get replaced just how much better it will feel.  My SIL has degenerative arthritis and had both her hips replaced 10 years ago and has been so much more active since.  My mother for the longest time had hip pain and did nothing for it, she was to the point that she could barely walk and was a real ray of sunshine to be around.  She finally saw a doctor about it and she was bone on bone in both hips.  They replaced them and wow what a difference.  She goes to exercise classes, walks a bunch and it no longer bitchy and snippy because she’s in constant pain. She’s just bitch and snippy because she’s old lol.

AgedOut's picture

"wow what a difference.  She goes to exercise classes, walks a bunch and it no longer bitchy and snippy because she’s in constant pain. She’s just bitch and snippy because she’s old lol."



That's my goal. bitchy and snippy just because... 

Rags's picture

Doing pretty good!  I have been blessed to never have a whole day that was entirely bad.  There has always something, even if it is a small thing, about every day I have ever had that is good and a blessing.  Some days it takes some effort to recognize it, but it is always there.

DW and I are in a reconnection cycle.  I was stranded at my parents' home for nearly 2mos  due to a huge hail storm blasting my car.  I got home  the day before DW left for a business trip. She got home on the redeye flight the Friday before TG. We left Sat AM to drive 15hrs to her home town in SpermLand to spend the holiday with my IL clan.

Now we are relearning to live together in our home.  We had our usual reconnection arguement a couple of evenings ago.  Not my proudest moment but par for the course when we are relearning our together dynamic.  We just hit the fun part of the reconnecting.


And..... I have 3 strong companies knocking on my door for some very interesting career roles.

Now to see if I can balance advancing those opportunities while focusing on us and on having a couple of weeks of family focused Holiday time.  

The role I am most interested in is the Unicorn opportunity of my profession.  They are also agressively moving to fill the role. I just finished a call with them. The have jumped me two steps in their hiring process and have put me in front of their chief executive for the business unit they are interested in my leading.  I may spend the holiday season and the next year or so in an extended stay in the middle of Winter hell. But even that would be a blessing for sure.


My niece and her DH have unveiled the name of our STB grandniece due in May. They did IVF (fortunately only one cycle).  She has my niece's and my dad's middle name.  I lost my bid for a version of my name.  Oh well.  Dad lost his bid for them to use his first name too but his middle name is moving into the 3rd gen of the Rags clan.

I am about to put out a hit on the Skid for not calling his mom often enough. But, he is apparently doing great so he may live another day. Just maybe.

My grandmother used to say "May you life in interesting times."  That blessing, or maybe curse, continues to hold true for my life.

Thanks for asking.  

Have a great Holiday and New Year.

AgedOut's picture

Fingers crossed for your potential new job! 


I'm glad you and the Mrs got past that first spat. It's hard to readjust when you've just gotten used to going  at your own pace. Give you SS hell lol. I've got one son like hers, he's doing great but man I wish he'd check in a bit more often. My other son calls me daily. We're in a fantasy fooball league together and that's the excuse for the calls. I'm not complaining, his wife says it gives her a break from his ride home calls. Once football's over, he'll still call. To discuss next years football of course. (and to let me have my moment since my Lions are doing okay this year)



Rags's picture

My brother and I are your boys!!!

I call mom and dad every day during my commute. Usually to and from work.

My brother... it is like pulling teeth for mom and dad to get him to call. Though he has improved over the past few years.

Since SS has not called, I have not called off the hit man.  

Hmmmm. Maybe that is why he hasn't called.




la_dulce_vida's picture

Thanks for asking! I'm doing pretty well.

My Christmas cards are in the mail. Yes, I'm a dinosaur in that respect. I love sending them and don't care if I don't get any back.

We don't have the tree up yet kittens. I have the tree box open in the living room so they can satisfy their curiosity. I'll probably have it up with unbreakable ornaments sometime next week.

All my shopping is done. I'm only buying for my 3 adult kids with a budget of $200 each. Easy peasy.

I have a work holiday function on Friday and a kayaking club party on Saturday night with all of my best buddies.

Next week, I'll be heading up to my partner's house for about a week, taking my kittens. We're not exchanging gifts or doing anything truly Christmas-y, but I will likely be baking Christmas cookies at his house. He will be happy to collect a cookie tax from me. LOL

For Christmas-proper, my grown kids will spend Christmas Eve with their dad but spend the night at my house. We'll watch some Christmas movies and be the peanut gallery, snarking at them. LOL We'll open gifts/stockings in the AM and I'll make them a Christmas breakfast. The day after Christmas, my daughter and I are scheduled to take a candlelight tour of 11 houses of worship in a small city near us.

I feel good. I don't really feel stressed except a little bit, financially. My 2 older kids were laid off over the summer. My son got a job after 2 months unemployed, so I had to carry him because he rents part of my other house. My daughter is currently living with me and still unemployed, so I'm covering all living costs and some groceries while she's here. It's been a pinch, but we'll manage.

I feel happy and at peace with my life right now. I hope you find some peace from the chaos and stress. Just a tip: I no longer do what others EXPECT of me. I do only what makes me happy, and it feels good.

AgedOut's picture

I'm Tiaasaurus, I'm also a dinosaur that sends out cards. I probably always will. I like sending them. 


You peaked my interest with kayak club. We've considered selling the canoe and investing in kayaks. As long as we're on the water, I'd be good with an inflatable Barney raft. 

I like the way you do holidays. Low key and comfy. I have a rule for our Christmas breakfast, they can come in relaxing clothes if they want. I used to give them each pj pants from Old Navy and it's just a mellow time for jokes and fun. 

I'm so happy you found what makes you happy!

Rags's picture

Mom always does a great Christmas breakfast.  Christmas at mom and dad's is always an all day feasting, togetherness, and gift fest.

Lol. My GPs used to give us PJs every year. That was the only gift we were allowed to open on Christmas Eve.  We had to put them on, sleep in them, and wear them on Christmas AM when we opened gifts.

Now, I wear "flop togs" on Christmas AM.  All I add to the sleep pants and pocket T I sleep in (I wear Pocket Ts as undershirts to put my insulin pump in), I add my Bah-Humbug hat.  Dad wears his too. These things have to be at least 25yrs old.

CLove's picture

Im the engine that wants to, and just ran into a wall.

This year, due to being childless, Ive decided I want to do holidays for ME. And then got a cold bug, so Ive been taking sick days, and just vegging out, rather than working out.

I did get some decor from husbands sister. All we had is a tree with ornaments and the built in  lights just went out. But I found a few new-to-me trees with lights at the st vincent, some garlands at goodwill and those along with SIL bounty will decorate 3 rooms. I just started decorating last night by myself. Husband, who normally likes to at least trim the tree, just seems to have given up, and is just interested in watching football in the garage. Any help he does provide is punctuated with huge sighs. Im powering forward, even if discouraged. For me.

But our holiday photo card is stuck with Husband not wanting to. So Ill have to do what I did last time and improvise. Or send later.

As to skidville and family and the Christmas Day plans - husbands family typically has a  big blowout with white elephant on the Eve, but thats not happening until Dec 30, which feral forger wants to attend, as I have seen on the group family texts. Sooooo we are on our own basically. My parents who live locally, I might do something with them. Ive been wanting to go out of town on a trip. Husband has used all his PTO while Ive been squirreling mine away so it will have to be a weekend thing I guess. Everything is just Meh. Husband and I had an argument, hes being very selfish in different ways, and not really helping with anything and finances are tight because of his fishing trips and property taxes due.

Work - well the Manager and Assistant manager sit in their offices chatting the days away, and Im pretty much on my own. With this (very mild) cold bug I have Ive been using it as an excuse to stay home, as Ive accrued 3 weeks of sick time. just got my work evaluation and was dinged for teamwork, even while being told how wonderful I am. I am considering disputing it, because the new-ish assistant manager (who spent the past 1 year and 4 months chatting for hours with the retiring assistant manager) is not a team player. I have done my darndest to try to be "teaming" and see him as the issue of why its awkward and uncomfortable when the manager tries to give us tasks that we must accomplish together.

Just all around feeling "stuck" and when I try to power foward feel like its just brick wall after brick wall. Guess I have to just continue moving forward even so.

I hope whatever you do, it works.

AgedOut's picture

I am sorry your December involves feeling sick. Do things your way since Mr Stick up his youknowwhat is being a bag of dicks. I tried to jump start my holidays by playing Christmas music and forcing myself to open the boxes and start. It flowed from there. 

It's hard to be able to do teamwork when the team won't play well together. or are they looking for excuses to not give out raises?? 


Merry's picture

I'm doing pretty well. Since SD has decided she's mad at DH and not speaking to him, and disinvited him for Christmas, most holiday dread has fallen away. He still doesn't know why she's mad and she's not responding to him. He told me today he's going to send her a check for the grands for Christmas and that's it.

It's quiet and peaceful in the Merry household. 

AgedOut's picture

Good on him for not dropping to his knees and pleading for her forgiveness for whatever imagined slight she invented. Juat think, now you can do local things just the two of you!!!

grannyd's picture

Thanks for thinking of us again, AgedOut! Speaking of ‘Age’, I recently had my 79th birthday, made particularly special because I’ve succeeded in losing almost 35 lbs since April. Because my body is lighter, my arthritis has improved; I’m also enjoying the fact that the lovely clothes I’ve made myself over the last 5 years are fitting again! My wonderful, handsome husband has been hugging me relentlessly and the twinkle in his eye is gleaming ever brighter.

I love cooking and have spent the last 2 weeks developing a sourdough starter to make my own bread. It’s a hassle that requires a lot of time and patience but I’m determined. I’m also sewing and crocheting, making blouses and slippers for my sisters and nieces. It’s good to be busy, having regained a lot of energy from shedding the adipose that was weighing me down.

I was kidding to my best friend that a woman’s favourite 3 words, rather than, “I love you”, are actually, “You’ve lost weight!” All is good in grannydland and I hope that all of my fellow StepTalkers have a grand Christmas and a thriving New Year.

AgedOut's picture

Look at you!!!!!

Really, look at you! What a lifestyle change those lost pounds make for. I'm seriously impressed. Especially with your sewing/crocheting skills too! I always wanted to learn to crochet but no one I know does it. I have crochet envy now, I bet there's a local class I can take. What kind of projects are you making?

grannyd's picture

Aw, thanks for asking, AgedOut,

As for sewing, I just finished making myself a very flattering A-line dress. The best thing about sewing my own clothing is the ability to choose the fabric and styles/patterns that both appeal and compliment my figure. I've also been making dresses for the little autistic girl next door. She’s a wee girly-girl who loves wearing a dress and has a meltdown when her mother tries to put slacks on her. She's only 6 years old so I'm able to create many of her small frocks with leftover fabric.

I taught myself to crochet using a DVD from Staples. Since then, there have been numerous and terrific videos available on YouTube. Here’s one for beginners: With a little patience, crocheting is an easy skill to acquire. My sisters and nieces love the slippers from grannyd; I developed the pattern myself and enjoy working on them while I’m watching TV or, in reality, crocheting while my husband watches TV!

If you decide to give crocheting a shot, I'd be delighted to hear how you progress!


PetSpoiler's picture

I'm freezing!  Being cold-natured is no fun.  I got my tree up and decorated, got my lights  up outside and bought a second star shower.  I love those things!  I live in the south and it is so tempting to be a red neck and just leave my lights up all year long. I also finished buying my kids their presents, I'm just waiting for them all to be delivered.  I managed to buy something that my daughter has been wanting for years but it was too expensive.  I finally found it for an affordable price.  

I hurt my toe a few months ago and it is still swollen.  It only hurts occasionally but I guess I'll have my doctor look at it when I go see him.  I'm keeping up my exercise routine and am hoping for good news next week on my bloodwork, specifically my cholesterol. He was trying to push me to take a statin two years ago and I told him no.  It went down last year, not where it needs to be, but he was happy to see it going down, so he didn't mention anything about taking a statin.  I'm hoping it's down even more now.  I'd also gained a few pounds recently but I think I've lost it.  I hope.  I know my clothes are fitting better again.  I had a weight problem years ago and am worried about gaining again.  I'm trying to stay in my size 4's though.  Can't afford a new wardrobe.  

Perimenopause is acting ugly.  For me it's been really bad PMS.  Anxiety, bursting into tears for no reason, occasional irritability, dizziness, mild panic attacks.  Sometimes I get night sweats.  Thankfully no hot flashes.  My mom had them, my sister has them or did.  I'll be lucky if I escape them.  

I also had an abnormal mammogram in October.  I went back early last month for a second more detailed and more uncomfortable mammogram and ultrasound.  The result was a cyst but instead of them saying definitely benign, it's in that category of probably benign, with a less than two percent chance of it being malignant.  So I get to do it again in early May so they can watch it.  I'm more annoyed than worried. I'd rather know for sure if it's something to worry about or if it's going to just go away. This business of we'll watch it and see what it does is irritating.  Mom was not happy with the "probably benign" finding either, saying "they probably need to figure out if it is or not!"  There is family history of breast cancer, colon cancer, and lymphoma on my dad's side of the family. My doctor called Dad's family medical history "interesting". The only one in my dad's immediate family of origin to not have cancer of any kind is my uncle, who has survived two heart attacks.  So there is a part of me that is concerned. 

Other than that I guess I'm doing alright.  

grannyd's picture

Hey, PetSpoiler,

My sincere sympathies on your menopausal symptoms! However, consider yourself lucky in that you're not experiencing hot flashes; they made my life a living hell in my early fifties and beyond. In fact, I still 'flash' when I'm stressed or overexerted. 'Ol Mother Nature gave us a crap deal with the change of life torment, yes? 

I had to look twice over your ...trying to stay in my size 4's comment. Hon, any woman fortunate enough to wear a skimpy size 4 does not have to worry about her weight! Mind you, sizes aren't what they used to be; when I was younger, I wore a size 12 and although my weight hasn't changed much in the last 50 years (apart from pregnancy and a gradual gain over the last couple of years, now lost), the clothes I buy are now size 8!

It appears that clothes manufacturers are conning us, fearing that if they put a true size on an item of clothing, we'd back off in horror and they'd lose a sale. Unknw

advice.only2's picture

Perimenopause sucks!!! I have all these amazing side effects: weight gain, facial hair, heart palpitations, anxiety, bad PMS, no sex drive, dizziness, horrible allergies out of the blue, bad breath (I brush and floss all the time), smell phantom smells, night sweats, morning sweats while I’m getting ready, freezing cold to the bone at times, my mammories are tender for no reason (normal mammogram), bone weary tiredness, brain fog (which sucks when I need to use my brain).  And the cherry on top is that my periods are regular AF and now instead of one day of bleeding death I get several days of bleeding death, followed by nothing and then a day later a nice gush that if I’m not wearing period underwear I’m screwed.  FUCK PERIMENOPAUSE!

grannyd's picture

Oh, those morning sweats! Getting ready for work and having your scalp damp and your hair limp before you've even finished styling it! I'd get frustrated which would immediately trigger an effing hot flash and make me perspire even more. Hon, menopause is not for the faint of heart. 

Worse still are the night sweats that you mentioned; waking up in a damp bed must be what babes experience when greeting the morning with a wet diaper. The only plus in those years of abject misery is, after that last period, being able to hang all of one's underpants on the line. If Rags is reading this, we're probably making him blush! Blush


advice.only2's picture

"Oh, those morning sweats! Getting ready for work and having your scalp damp and your hair limp before you've even finished styling it! I'd get frustrated which would immediately trigger an effing hot flash and make me perspire even more"

All of this!!! I now have to wear a t-shirt and shorts while I get ready for the day because if I have anything on that might make me even the tiniest bit warm it's all over.  I also have a fan I turn on and blow it directly on me while I do my make-up.  Its cold here and I still have to use the damn fan lol.

grannyd's picture

~ Its cold here and I still have to use the damn fan lol.~

Hell yeah! I had fans all over the house (like you, even in the winter months), in addition to the small one at my work desk. Why did women end up with all the shit stuff; excruciatingly painful childbirth, periods, menopause etc. while men managed to escape it all? We may live a little longer but those years of miserable menopause are hardly worth it! It makes me suspect that God was  a man?

Rags's picture


I love you ladies.  But so glad I'm not one.  Y'all got the challenges in our species.

Us men have it easy.

Give rose

grannyd's picture

Rags, you are the very soul of diplomacy; it's no wonder that we ladies are so fond of you! Kiss 2

Elea's picture

than doing this whole Christmas thing again. I don't really care where, somewhere in Europe? South America? Indonesia? Britain? My last BK turned 18 and is reasonably independent and self-sufficient. I have an itch to travel.

DH and I have several moving pieces to wrap up at home before we can really take off to see the world. In the meantime, I will probably dust off my sewing machine and churn out a few Christmas gifts.

I am happy that OSDiabla26 will NOT be gracing us with her presence this Christmas. The bad news is YSDiabla24 is gracing us but has yet to buy tickets or set an arrival date. BM recently moved out of state (yay!) but the downside is that now when YSD24 gets her panties in a twist (a common occurence) she will have no BM to storm off to and we will be stuck dealing with her sulky dramatic butt. I plan to take deep breaths, disengage and say "bye" when YSD inevitably drags DH out to do stuff with just dadddeeeee for her wittle "one on one" time. At 24 she is still a (annoying) child.

I am not in the spirit to decorate. "Meh" is exactly how I feel. Waiting to see if DH starts to pull Christmas out of the garage ... If not we may have a very plain Christmas. I'll at least bake some Christmas cookies.

grannyd's picture

Elea, you have sparked my curiosity with your  ~...I will probably dust off my sewing machine and churn out a few Christmas gifts. ~

What will you be sewing? Do you make your own clothes? Perhaps baking cookies will awaken some Christmas spirit!

Elea's picture

Thx for asking grannyd. I found a doll bed for my cute little niece. I am making her a blanket and pillow to go on the bed. I may make some Christmas stockings if I can keep the spirit up. I am not a great seamstress by any stretch of the imagination but I have fun with it. I don't make my own clothes but I used to make my daughter dresses when she was little. I wish I had a granny around to help me learn to sew even better.