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Three Little Pigs

khakirose's picture

I am new to this forum and relieved to have a place to express my taboo feelings.

My three step daughters have a lot of horrible habits, ages 10, 8, 7. One of these bad habits is eating like pigs. Their father, my husband, eats a lot and their bio mother is over weight too. These kids spend a lot of time with their grandmother who feeds them constantly. We have them 50% of the time.

THEY EAT LIKE PIGS! Two of the girls are over-weight and over eat at every meal stuffing their faces literally til food falls out of their mouths or they drop it in their laps. They consistently use their hands and end up with food in their hair and on their clothes. They smack and ask for more food while food is still on their plate. They talk with so much food in their mouths you can't understand what they are saying. We can feed them any meal and then they want to know if they can eat more or have dessert. They eat twice what I am able to consume and I am an adult.

I have talked with their dad about portion control and healthy eating. I have gently tried to get them to use better table manners but now, it grosses me out to eat with them. It is to the point where I cannot eat with them anymore.

My husband is so tired of my complaints he just tunes me out and I am beginning to look like the bad guy no matter what I do or how nice I do it. Should I just start skipping dinner or eating before I get home? It is really, really bad!

Ssamantha's picture

I don't particularly care for the table manners of SD11 and SS7 either. I just try not to eat with them and since I get home later than their Dad, it works out great. I've complained about their manners a million times and finally succeeded in getting them to actually sit and eat vs eat, dance, sing, and dance some more. As far as using a napkin and not hunching over their plates and the all around greed surrounding food, not so much.

Timetogiveup's picture

Girlfriend.....my heart goes to you. Mine (SS17...AKA Stink). Is a pig too, eats with his mouth open, can't use a knife and fork, inhales the food so fast he almost chokes (he does this he can get first dibbs on seconds, he will snatch things up really fast and shove it in his mouth IF he think someone else wants it, he also stuffs his face like a chipmunk with "community food" (like shared apps....he'll me shoving more in while he is still chrewing), he spat on the wait staff in a 5-star resturant because he didn't like his food (first and last time he went to a nice place) and once in a while he will blow his nose in his shirt or in the table cloth during dinner. I do EVERYTHING I can NOT to eat with the kid....I gave up on this one.

Ssamantha's picture

I have to put down an old placemat over my nice placemat because SS7 spills food EVERY single time he eats. After every single meal, I have to wipe down our new dining room table because he wipes his dirty fingers all over the table and there are dirty food streaks all over. He wipes his hands on his clothes even though a napkin is sitting right in front of him.

I've been told this is normal. I'm wondering when he's going to grow out of this.

Jsmom's picture

Disengage now. My Stepson has terrible eating habits. I pointed it out and now DH sees it and is on him. I don't say a word unless he is actually spilling on the floor. I stopped us from eating in my Dining room because he is a disaster. DH thought I was mean, but I kept saying it was for company. I did not want to have to replace the dining room chairs, because SS can't keep food in his mouth. I would embarass them about the behavior. Otherwise, take your dinner somewhere else and tell them why. They have to be having other kids make fun of them. Play on that and you might get somewhere. Otherwise, disengage and remember that these are not your problems....they are your DH's.

dragonfly5's picture

OH MY!!! I totally understand sd10 and ss13 had the worst table manners! I told my BF that we needed to work on it because it was an embarrassment for them now and would be in the future. It is also a reflection of him as a parent. It amazes me because my BF has good manners. The BM however does not cook, and I do not mean rarely I mean never. The restaurants near them know them by name and the kids have the menus memorized. She even goes through the drive through the night before for their school lunches the next day. But her table in their home is set with the china year round. All show…

I asked my ss10 to put her napkin in her lap one time at my house, looked at me very puzzled, and said I don’t have one. I pick mine up and said sure you do sweetie. She said she was looking for a real napkin (paper). I said this is a real napkin. Not the paper one from the restaurants’ you eat at all the time.

The good news is BD keeps working on it with them and I gently remind them on things occasionally. I leave it mostly up to BD, it is better received. They have improved…so much ss10 can actually cut up her meat by herself and holds the knife the correct way. We still need some work on the fork but we are slowly making a difference. It is a constant reminding for ss13. Old habits are hard to break. However, he takes it well and has made a little progress.

There is hope khakirose, let the BD know it is a relection on him.