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The sound that makes my ears bleed...

Goincrazy40's picture

is the sound of FDH's cell phone ringing with a phone call or text in the evening. Because I know who it is. BM.

Why that woman cannot just send an email is beyond me. She always has to "double check" everything. And he won't tell her to stop, because if he makes her mad, she will swing to the wrong side of the bi-polar disorder and become a miserable bitch.

She must have sent him five texts today, in spite of seeing him at a game in the afternoon.


stepmomto3bioto1's picture

Yea, I used to cringe alot too, for the first year and a half. Then I set DH straight on some things. BM would call at inappropriate times & about inappropriate things. I swear i think the stupid twit thought my Dh was still married to her, in her twisted brain!!

One day about six months ago or something, I had just flat out had enough of her antics. It was truly hard for me to have a relaxing time with DH. I remember lots of times ruined by her.

I told my DH once, during one of her pathetic calls, demanding this and that out of us, to flat out ask her if she knew what she had become? A meddling ex wife!!! Thats who she had become.

So, I had done some research online, searching for my sanity i guess. I came accross a few articles of how hard it is, to deal with trying to coparent in high conflict situations. Pretty much the articles stated that we had to disengage & set very firm boundaries. I forwarded the articles to DH & he forwarded them to BM With our notes on how & why she had made all this so strenuous.

We set boundaries on how often & when she was to contact us. Which were: ALL phone calls will now go to voicemail: no more answering the phone when she called. She was to leave a message & he would listen to it. If it was Urgent only- then he would call her back. If not, then he would answer via email. Another was: NO more texting. Period. Emails from now on We told her NO more calls, texts, etc after 8pm. Unless a true emergency had imcurred.

At first she was very hateful to our new way. But. I can say- life has gotten a TON better. Wish we had done it alot sooner!!!!!

Would your DH be willing to set & enforce some boundaries with your BM? I swear it has helped me a ton!!! Its worth a good try to save your sanity!!

twopines's picture

My stomach clenches when DH's text alert goes off. SD26 is on the other end every single time. This morning it went off at sevenfuckingthirty in the morning even though he has told her to not text him that early.

momoftwinz's picture

I go thru this when SD is here. When I see SD send a text or playing with her phone and then DH's phone rings, I just leave the room. 9 out of 10 times it's SD just sent some message to her mom and BM has to call DH about it.

janeyc's picture

It make's me thing "what now", she is extremely disorganised, always late and unreliable, I don't know why she bothers to text because it always changes anyway.

janeyc's picture

Good for you, if you don't stand up for yourself nobody else will. I bet that wiped the smile off BMs face tee hee Smile

Auberry2's picture

SS5's BM stays up FDH's backside whenever she has SS5 for her weekends. Seriously. FDH is CP and while he with us she never calls, not even to ask her son how his day has been, but from the moment she picks SS5 up until she drops him off she is calling FDH. "SS5 won't do this, SS5 won't do that, SS5 says you and Auberry let him do/have everything he wants, SS5 passed gas and it sounded like the methane had attitude" You name it, she is on the phone about it "You need to talk to him, he won't listen" Oh La.