I am so sick of BM getting her way and my MIL!

A little background on BM. When SS8 was a few months old she cheated on DH (they however were never married) and she took off. DH has been raising SS since with a lot of help from my MIL. BM started seeing SS when he was about 3 or 4 years old. Would take him 1 or 2 nights on the weekends. She has consistently had problems with drugs and alcohol. Has been in rehab for heroine I guess. So anyway, when DH and I met 3 years ago BM started taking SS every weekend. Claimed it wasn’t fair that I got to be a mother to her son and wanted to spend more time with him (and at this time she was clean). From the beginning I have been annoyed because this woman has never had to pay child support because she has never had a job and lives on welfare. DH’s lawyer when he took her to court to gain full legal custody told him not to bother, he would get nothing. Every now and then BM buys SS some school clothes in the beginning of the year and other then that and “babysitting” on the weekends, she contributes nothing. Half the time when she was taking SS on the weekends he would end up at my MIL’s somehow.

Fast forward to Christmas. My MIL got a phone call from BM’s grandmother that her grandmother stopped by to see BM and the kids (she has a 2 year old from her current marriage) and that my MIL might want to go get my SS8 because BM was drunk off her a$$ (at 10am) and that the baby was running around barefoot and there was broken glass on the floor. BM was arrested for child neglect that day and now the baby is in foster care and we have SS all of the time now.

A little background on MIL. Things I never knew. Apparently DH and his sister were raised by their father because my MIL (who really has been great to me since the day we met) dropped her kids off to him one day and took off and didn’t raise them herself. DH basically went through the same crap that SS is going through right now and thank god DH has grown into the great man he is because honestly, that would have destroyed me as a child.

Ok, so MIL comes to my house the other day and sat on my couch and had the nerve to tell me how bad she feels for BM. I said why is that? She said because she really misses the kids. Then told me that whenever she babysits SS8, she brings him to BM’s house to visit. SS and her 2 year old are not to be anywhere near BM without an assigned supervisor. I asked her how often she does this and she said every time she watches SS. This is at least once a week. The foster parents want to adopt the baby and I said perhaps that would be best and she got so upset with ME and told me that BM is their mother and she loves them and actually said to me, “we have all been there”. Been where? On heroine and drunk? Are you kidding me? I haven’t been there! Not ever!! Nor would I! For her to sit in my house and tell me she feels bad for that BM who hasn’t been a mother to SS especially since day 1 made me ill! She then told me that BM has a job now and she gave her a reference. HA. So when DH got home I said on Tuesday (his day off) you better run to family court and apply for child support because I am sick of this slob not having to have ANY responsibility!!! She does NOTHING to contribute to her son. And now that I have her son full time, even on my days off, even if she has to pay only $25 a week, there is my babysitting fees!!! I am not allowed to scold this child cause every time I have tried to discipline him he calls his “mommy” to tell on me and then I have to hear her on the phone screaming at DH who just uh huh uh huh uh huh’s her to death. I’m sick of her getting away with it. Not only that but when she was able to see him she doesn’t have a car so DH constantly was bringing him back and forth. That’s gas money. A lot of it. And he never told her no. He would drop everything to bring him cause he was doing it for SS (who for whatever reason adores her). I have never and will never speak ill of her in front of SS but I have enough.

So anyway, DH applied for it, let’s see what happens. Probably nothing since she’s still surviving through social services.

Oh, then, HEARTBREAKING! CPS came to my house after that drunken incident and SS told the man that his mom pays him 1 penny per cigarette butt he picks up after she smokes them. I also brought that up to my MIL and asked her if she still felt bad for her. She didn’t comment on that. She just kept saying how bad she felt for her. AAAHHHHH. It’s been driving me crazy! I guess I just needed to get in a quick vent!