SD finally joined the "i don't like it here i wanna go home to my mom's!"
Sd did dishes one night after dinner on her EOWE with dh. When it came time for dd15 turn to do dishes she noticed quite a few of sd's dishes were still filthy. She went ahead and cleaned them but mentioned to sd that there were a few dirty dishes from when she did them. Dh over heard this and said "sd you gotta do a better job next time." She totally flipped out on him screaming at him that she wants to go to her mom's house, that she doesn't like it here. When dh asked her what she ws talking about, she started going off on:
how she always finds dirty dishes after dd15 does dishes.
Ok, and we make her redo the dishes when we know she did a poor job.
And then she points her finger at me and says I'm so mean to her when dh isn't around.
I make sure I'm not around sd when dh isn't around, because i know she likes to lie about people.
Then she go on about how dd14 points out all of her flaws. (In reference to an earlier conversation dd and sd had) .
They were talking about how a certain dress floated her figure more so than another one (because sd asked dd her opinion since they were getting pictures done the next day)
Then she said i defend dd or are always on dds side when they have an argument.
Last time they had an argument i told dd to watch out how she spoke to sd, or she will be receiving a punishment, didn't even make a comment on the fact that sd ws ALSO in the wrong, even though she was thre one instigating the fight. (This happened MONTHS ago, before i decided to not be around sd without the presence of dh)
She was so pissed off that everything she said ws being turned down as an apparent lies. She insisted she call BM to conne and get her. So Dh said, no, i'l call her and talk to her about what's going on and see if she thinks you need to come home right now. She freaked out and said. No no no, i'l call her!
After all of this i don't even know what to think. What was the point of all this? Dh wasn't angry or yelling about the dirty dishes, he just said do better next time. He didn't even make her redo any of them. Her got pissed that she flipped out on him. He got angry that she was spewing lies. No punishment was given, just a long conversation.
All this was even after dh has been spending even MORE time with sd lately, he's been making sure that she gets to do more things that she's excited about, she even got to go to a concert last time dh had her. Dh makes sure that she gets to go to any party/invite/school function that occurs on his time. I'm completely at a loss.
I waffle on this type of
I waffle on this type of situation. Between "Hell no. You aren't going anywhere. Get in there and do the damned job the right way and then, because you a being a lippy disprectful little shit you can choose between bending over, assuming the position and getting belt to the ass or sitting at the dining table writing 10,000 times in perfect handwriting, perfect grammar and perfect spelling".
"I will do the job the way it supposed to be done. I will not be a disrespectful brat to my father or anyone else this this home. I will do what I am told, when I am told and I will do it without grimmacing, frowning, huffing, puffing or saying anything but Yes Sir or Yes Ma'am."
All at a rate of 180 times per hour.
And.... "Don't let the door knob hit you in your snarky teen ass on your way out. Leave your key on the table as you leave. And no, you can't take anything from this home with you."
Mine is pulling that shit too
Mine is pulling that shit too so guess what, he gets to spend the whole summer at moms, with no bedroom, on the couch, no video games, no friends and zilch to do. EN-FING-JOY you brat! Grass won't appear so much greener when it's more than a week of Disney mom.
So what happened? Did BM
So what happened? Did BM demand her Precious comes home right away, or make her stay and deal with things at your house?
Long conversations only work
Long conversations only work on people with a conscience.... I still remember in 7th grade getting an A-... 9 hours of a lecture later... Never happened again. Straight As from then on out... *shudder*
However for SD6, you talk to her, she repeats the crap... SO we tend to have other consequences for her. Talk to SD10 and she feels guilty. Same thing with the dogs, You glare at mine and he's immeadiatley sucking up. His brother ran off one day, my dog followed, but came STRAIGHT back before he even fully made it out of sight, he felt so guilty that when I got his brother home and was scolding him, he worked himself up to hyperventillating (I then calmed that fur baby and cuddled him). Whereas DH's dog doesn't have a guilty bone in his body and has zero remorse for pretty well ANYTHING, thankfully he's too lazy to get into too much trouble. Moral of that rant... Different kids have to be punished in different ways. Your SD needs some actual consequences from the sound of it.
I'm curious as to how all this ended. Did she ever get a consequence? Did DH call BM and say what was really going on? Or did he let SD call and probably give a string of lies?
Oh, dh never called BM, sd
Oh, dh never called BM, sd was texting BM about how mean everyone was being and dh did nothing about it (other than the long discussion).
That sucks that there was no
That sucks that there was no consequence. My SO never wanted to deal with BM and most of the time we wouldn't realized BM was coming to rescue SD until she was pulling into the apartment complex. Always over trivial stuff like brushing her hair or helping us clean up. I remember one time though SO went to take a shower and told me to tell SD to not leave until he had a chance to talk to BM. The look of panic on her face when I told her was as pricless. Sadly BM was in a rush and not willing to talk so SD got away with it.
I hope your DH is able to resolve this before it gets worse.
He won't, he totally played
He won't, he totally played into all of it. He knows she was lying, but in the end he bought her poor me i feel so ganged up on.