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SD is always surprising me, but maybe it's just her school district... Dh says it's just SD

nunya1983's picture

A few weeks ago SD10 (5th grade) comes in with a grin on her face saying she can read at a 7th grade reading level. As surprised as I am I tell her, "wow, that's great! I'm so proud of you!"

That night she wants to make cards for her teachers, so dh sits down with her while I relax with my new adult coloring books coloring away into zen lol.

SD asks dh "how do you spell science?" Dh asks her, "how do you think you spell it?" Not quizzing her, but trying to get her to think about it on her own, because she's the type that will ask you to do something for her with out trying first. So she begins "S-I-A-N-S"
Dh tells her "good try, but try again."
"Baby, that spells seas"
"No daddy, that's S-E-E-S"
"Great spelling, but that's another kind of sees"

Good thing I'm not at the table with them as my eyes are big and I'm holding back laughter.

He ends up telling her how to spell it, as science is a hard word, I get it. Then comes another word.

"Daddy, how do you spell school?"
"How would you spell it sweetie?"
"But that one is hard too daddy."
"You can try, it's OK"
"Ok, S-K-O-U-H-L"
"No, try again love"
"Daaaaddddyyy,it's too hard!"
"Come on hun,one more try"
Then he spelled it for her.
"Uh uh, c-h makes a ch ch sound, like Choo Choo train"

Things like that, and being from the US and on the border, she should know where Mexico is, she's been there, but no, she had to label a map, and said that she wasn't sure if Canada or Mexico went there. Dh tried giving her hints, but she still got it wrong. He gave her many ways to think through it, but she had no clue.

At first I thought she was just playing him, but she was genuinely confused and had no idea.

My kids are in 6th and 7th, so I've been through this very recently. They've been labeling maps since 3rd grade, they had science and school as spelling words in 3rd grade. My 7th grader is currently reading the christmas carol,I can guarantee you that if you can't spell school,there is no way you can read the christmas carol.

Now I am not saying that this is necessarily sd's fault. She can't help it if her school district sucks. We (dh,me, dds)have been trying to make SD want to transfer to the dds school district when she goes to middle school. Dh doesn't want to yank her out unless she wants to because bm is against it and BM will tell SD, see, this is all your father's fault, any time SD complains about switching schools, but if SD is for it, then there will be less of a chance for parental alienation to happen.

nunya1983's picture

Also to clarify, I was about to laugh because #1 dh was cute helping SD so sweetly and I thought SD was playing dh.

Thank you Tuesday, I agree!

Disneyfan's picture

This kid has had problems with spelling, speech....for years. Plenty of posters tried to give the OP tons of advice about the FREE services that are out there. Each time the response was something alomg the lines of BM has final say on everything.

I know that either parent can request services from the school and the school has to comply. If Bm gets in the way, dad and the school can call CPS and file educational neglect charges against her.

If dad didn't take the necessary steps to get the kid help back in 2nd and 3rd grade, there's no way he's going to do anything now. It's easier to sit back and blame mom.

nunya1983's picture

The school days she's reading on a 7th grade reading level, and nobody is blaming mom, except for her parental alienation.
I don't recollect posting about any speech impedance

Disneyfan's picture

She may very well be reading at that level. Running records test fluency and comprehension, not spelling.

Great, now mom os PASing the kid. That's new, kinda like SD being racist.LOL

Hopefully SD has started to open up to mom about the crap that goes on in your house.

nunya1983's picture

Yes, my phone likes to correct things that don't need to be corrected

Disneyfan's picture

They knew that girl had issues with spelling years ago, Nunya/Sheldon/Stepmominhidding posted a bunch of blogs about the child's struggles with spelling. Those blogs about her weekly spelling test (and speech issues) were pretty sad.

nunya1983's picture

Yes dh helps her with homework. His usual thing wroth her is spiraling and handwriting, that's why I was surprised to hear they tested her as reading at a 7th grade reading level.

nunya1983's picture

How would it offend me that she reads at a7th grade reading level? I was happy for her if it were true. I am always happy for any accomplishment she makes. Her grades are really good. She makes all As and Bs,and is in the GT classes. But this is all very surprising to me. I'm never mean to her about it. I always tell her that I'm proud of her accomplishments. But I'm always quite perplexed because she seems so behind when it comes to things like that. I agree that the school district she is in seems to be a very sad excuse of a school system.

notarelative's picture

You heard she is reading at grade 7 level. Did you see any paperwork on this?
BM and SD can say she is reading at 12th grade level. They can say anything.

Ask to see the paperwork. It should have more information than one grade level score.

It is possible to read above grade level and still have a spelling problem. If her spelling is as bad as you indicate and she is reading on grade level, SD should be eligible for services to help her.

Dad needs to go to the school and ask about the testing and her regular school work. He needs to assert his parental rights to school information. Once he has the actual.information he can decide what, if anything, to do.

Cover1W's picture

Schools have really changed since I was there.
The SDs don't have to memorize anything!
I was memorizing poetry, long ones, and having to recite them in 3rd grade.
4th grade was memorizing all the States and the capitals.
5th grade was memorizing continents/oceans/countries and their capitals.

Neither SD (4th and 6th grade now) have ever had to memorize the states. They can barely pick out anything on a map without really thinking about it and often get it wrong.

SD11 is just now having to learn the continents/oceans - and DP quizzed her. She didn't know what the largest ocean in the world is or how many there were. He was completely dumbfounded.

And these are two smart girls, both work ahead of their age groups.
Homework is mostly optional (which SD11 takes advantage of, but still pulls all A's, and SD9 loves and does it anyway). No memorization requirements, nothing.

I really feel that it creates lazy, uninformed (stress on the uninformed) young adults who don't know about anything. Who cares about what's going on in Egypt when you don't even know where it is or what's important about it.

onthefence2's picture

My brother was a genius and never got less than an A, from K to college. He went into a degree field that got him six figures and he probably still can't spell to save his life. He also wasn't a great writer. He is a math genius.

There are LOTS of kids who read well that can't spell. And I wouldn't say the school is failing her just because she can't spell. The school would be failing her if they didn't teach spelling at all (like many schools stop doing by 3rd grade).

I homeschool (and I have a teaching degree) and I am in facebook groups with other homeschooling families whose children don't pick up reading until 9 or 10 years old. They just all of a sudden get it and read novels. Now that would freak me out. My kids both read early and learn well, so I'm not saying I wouldn't be freaking out if my kids had learning problems. But I'm saying this to say there are TONS of kids out there who get one on one teaching who still have issues. Some need to be more addressed than they are, but a lot are just things that have to be endured. Many gifted kids have trouble spelling. They have more important things going on in their brains.