santa... One house or both?
How do you handle santa? When does he come and does he only give stockings/gifts at one house? I have two step kids and one bio son. I work shift work as did my step dad so don't always get xmas off. We where always told that mom and dad sent santa a letter to tell him when we where celebrating xmas. The mom got ahold of me and wants santa to come to only one house. She feels SD will stop believing as she is questioning it right now. But we have been doing it this way for the last 2 Christmase's. It also ds first xmas and I am not sure if this isn't a play to kind of throw a wrench into it for us as it is her year this year. But to me that doesn't seem right... and even then if we met in the middle and said presents get brought on xmas eve regardless there would be years that I don't get to wake up with my kids and see their excitement because I habe to work. So... thoughts?! What do you do? I have been trying and trying to figure out some middle ground it's 1 am and I have been trying to think of something since 10.
In my line of work it's
In my line of work it's typical to have to work through the whole thing... 12 hour shifts. Gotta love the medical field. That said we also don't split the day or else no one would get to see extended family. Both sides live 6 to 8 hours away from any extended family.
I do childcare for SD before
I do childcare for SD before and after school. BM and I do communicate because of that unfortunately. I have just taken the stance of I will not involve myself with parenting issues during that time. So I force myself to be civil and respect her parenting wishes during her parenting time. Somehow, it works, by some force of luck. Now , it would seem, BM has decided to communicate with me instead of SO. I am guessing she thinks we are on the same page because of the way I have handled daycare. Or, and most, likely she feels I am more easily manipulated than SO. She also threw in that once SD8 doesn't believe the boys (my and her son) are soon to follow. Over my dead body.
This is kinda funny, because
This is kinda funny, because on the other hand, SM's complain about spoiled rotten brats and how "they" are expected to contribute to the spoiling every Christmas. But now to spoil BM's wants, lets make sure they get more crap! Sheesh.
I've seen where Christmas is switched every year, and wherever they wake up Christmas morning is where Santa goes. They still get something from the other parent, but it's not from Santa. Who cares if a child stops believing? The alternative is lying even more and manipulating a kid with other antics to keep them falling for the lie... Not sure how old this child is, but I'm guessing it's past time for the "talk" about Santa. Dad should do what he wants to do for his child. BM can do what she wants to do, but can't decide for him what to do.
SD is 8 with a huge
SD is 8 with a huge imagination... loves elf on the shelf.
Oh, don't get me started on
Oh, don't get me started on that stupid elf. What a big fat money making scheme just to encourage more bs lying to kids. I mean, genius idea to the person who created it, but I'm just glad my kids are too old!
I can't stand it either. Have
I can't stand it either. Have you seen some of the Elf hater pics?
* The elf pinned against the wall several inches above the floor and Darth Vadar standing there with his hand out, holding the elf by the throat via The Force
* A big brawny guy standing over the bleeding elf he shot.
* The Bumble from Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer dunking the elf head-first into a toilet.
* Elf-on-elf - one elf doing another from behind.
I've seen elf being
I've seen elf being waterboarded by GI Joe!
This was never a problem for
This was never a problem for us. BM couldn't be bothered to actually get gifts for her kids for Christmas. She always relies on other family members to do that. When SD16 was little she always knew that Santa came to our house with her gifts. So happy we are passed all of the Santa stuff for her. DD7 on the other hand still believes.
Santa goes to BOTH homes for
Santa goes to BOTH homes for my SD5. Our agreement is to switch every year.. this christmas BM gets her Christmas Eve, and SO and I on Christmas Day.
We tried to organize
We tried to organize something like this this year BM feels she needs xmas and her entire days off with the kids. It turned into a big argument because SO only gets 5 days which lands in the middle of her 2 weeks. This ended in her insisting on us only getting the kids the night of the 28th and the day of the 29th. She's a real treat like that.
Santa goes to both houses for
Santa goes to both houses for all our kids and always has for the most part...
BM the first year or two didn't get the kids anything...said all their gifts went to DH house. She has asked that we only do one house so it doesn't confuse the kids too. We ignored her, we weren't going to miss out on the holidays because BM said she didn't want Santa coming to our house.
Santa comes to the house that
Santa comes to the house that the kids will wake up at on Xmas morning. That's how we've been doing it.
Our (my) challenge is that my ex gives "big" gifts from Santa and we give stocking stuffers and maybe a "family" gift (like a board game) from Santa...last week, my BD7 said that maybe she and SD11 weren't good enough last year, because Santa only gave them small presents in their stockings. :/
Me and DH have only agreed
Me and DH have only agreed that Santa comes on one night! There won't be any gift openings on Christmas Eve Day because Santa is suppose to come that night. With one kid for now its not difficult. This year SS will be with BM from Christmas Eve evening until Christmas Day evening and once he gets back we will open all the presents. I don't know how it will work out as more kids come along. They probably won't want to wait all day for SS to come back before opening their presents so we might just open gifts with them from us and Santa and then later let SS open his gifts from us and let him think Santa brought his gifts to BMs