I was set off last night and it triggered what I have been feeling lately. As you know I have not seen SS in a very long time. When I saw BF last night, he showed me a photo he and SS took while at the amusement park this week. SS looked so grown up, so sweet. The last time I saw him he was a little boy, now he is a teenager. Had I not seen the photo and bumped into SS in the street, I would not recognize him.
I was forgiving to what transpired with BM and supportive of BF’s efforts to support me, but over time I have been becoming resentful, especially over these sexting text messages. Now all I feel is resentment and my desire to be intimate with him has hit an all-time low. I think I am beginning to check out of the relationship emotionally. (Just found out about the sexting messages so not sure if I am dealing with it the right way).
Due to BF paying for individual therapy for himself and family therapy with SS, his insurance won’t pay for our therapy and we have not gone in a while since he started therapy with SS.
I’m really sick of BM dragging me into this, showing our sexting messages to everyone (I asked him if my name, job and phone number were taken out of evidence as I don’t want everyone in the courtroom knowing that), and he said he didn’t think to ask that. WTF?????
I secretly blame him as I feel that had she not been allowed to run the show and been put in her place a long time ago maybe none of this would have happened. (Like when she was show up announced at his home and demand to “Dump that skank” he didn’t think of saying, “You should know about skanks you’re the one sleeping with a married man!” Nope, of course not.
I know I should support him, but what happens when you just can’t anymore? Is there someone who has been in this place and come back from it?