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Resources of spouse in cs

bradybunch2013's picture

So Missouri divorcenet says the spouses income can be considered in cs calculations if you were to get remarried.

"A court can modify (change) a child support order that is already in place if either parent experiences a change in circumstances so substantial that continuing payments would be unreasonable. These situations tend to come up when a parent loses a job. Yet unemployment alone may not be enough to modify support, especially if a parent has remarried. The court reviews both parents’ financial resources, including the contributions of a new spouse or partner, when considering the reasonableness of child support payments. It will also evaluate the earning capacity of the unemployed parent (meaning how much that parent could earn based on education, skills, job history and employment opportunities), not merely the lost wages."

How is this right???

bradybunch2013's picture

I ask because my soon to be DH makes substantially more than I do (no billionaire by any means) and as my ex makes about the same as I do i was worried that they would try to use my DH's income in the calculation. He is already supporting his own 3 kids and I don't think it would be fair for his good income to affect how much the BD pays to support HIS bio kids.

jumanji's picture

Not necessarily. A court may look at how a spouse's income offsets the parent's expenses and use that offset in calculating CS.

Icansorelate's picture

prenup, postnup, seperate account and seperate tax returns...and still be prepared to pay your own lawyer to keep your income out of it. Or don't get married.

SugarSpice's picture

i would not marry if there is any chance your personal income would be construed as part of marital assets.

i am lucky that my trust assets were from inheritance. dh cant touch it even in divorce. since skids do not appreciate any thing i give them and resent any gifts i try to buy for them, thats more money for me.

speak to an attorney in family law on this in your state.

bradybunch2013's picture

Ya, I can see my ex trying to get his cs obligations to my kids lowered just because he isn't willing to go out and work as hard to earn as much as my SO.

We thought of having our own accounts and one joint one to just pay living expenses out of but I don't even want there to be a chance he can use that as a "resource" in the calculation.

What's a good way to split up who pays for what and still keep things separate? My SO has no problem spending any of his money on my kids the same as he does his own but I'd like to keep it as fair as possible.

bradybunch2013's picture

My SO is not reticent in the least. In fact he's fully of a mind to combine all our income and just dole it out as needed regardless of who's kids and how much cs and all that crap. I was simply stating that my ex's obligation to support his children shouldn't be affected by how much income my SO brings in. We now have 6 kids between the two of us which means the living expenses go up some too. My SO pays for his kids according to their needs and I feel my ex should do the same regardless of a remarriage or the difference in the new spouse's income.

I have not in the three years of our relationship ever been a money grubber just because my SO makes a nice income nor have I used ANY of his money to support my household or my kids. In fact I've suggested that when we do move in together and pool our resources the first thing we do is make out a budget and attack his debt so he can get his credit back up. I have no problem with my hard earned money going towards something he got himself into before I even met him. He's seen how well I handle my own finances and that I'm smart with my money and a penny pincher and he's ready to hand it all over to me to manage to benefit our combined household. I believe in getting rid of debt and working on savings so we will be able to handle anything that's thrown at us, together as a team.

And to be clear, my ex continues to work for himself regardless of the piddly amount he brings in because he likes sleeping till noon and being able to drink beer and smoke pot on the job. He has his shop on his mommy's property in the shed he stole off my marital property. I could care less if he chooses to live in poverty but it does affect MY kids and the opportunities that they have and that's where it IS very much my business.

I feel sorry for you all who are so unhappily married and miserable as SMs that you come on here and project your bitterness and misery onto other people who are just on here doing their best and asking for advice. Nobody asked for you to jump to conclusions and assume the worst. You see it in every new person that gets on this board and maybe that's because deep down you know you're miserable. Either that or you've just got way too much time on your hands that you feel the need to create drama to feel important. I pity you and your small thinking and skewed view of life. I for one, am happy in my relationship and with my kids and his kids. If that pisses you off, well then just be on your way and stop reading my posts!

bradybunch2013's picture

I'm sure this forum is so glad to have such a mature woman doling out "advice" to others.

bradybunch2013's picture

Whatever you want to believe. I am happy and you are judgemental. You know NOTHING of me or my situation. End of story. Please refrain from commenting on my posts. Your "advice" is not worth a cent to me and is not welcome.

bradybunch2013's picture

Then I guess I'm free to tell them to piss off then.

Didn't mean to offend anyone else. I welcome sincere advice from those who actually are trying to help.

bradybunch2013's picture

My bad, I must have just ASSUMED you were miserable and bitter. You know, like you tend to do about others.

We're not combining finances because we have to. If we do so it's because we both choose to work as a team in life. That's our prerogative. It's also my prerogative to help him get out of debt. Not necessarily by forking over my money exactly but by helping him budget his spending. We work as a TEAM/PARTNERS in everything we do and finances won't be any different. And don't worry about my kiddos, they will certainly be provided for the same as I always have. I'm just good enough to do both!

And I will pray for you if you'd like Wink