What do you mean, "see to it that it stops"? Legally, he's not a minor at 18 anymore (in the U.S.) but don't you need your DH's agreement for the time at your house to stop?
I mean that when SS turns 18, I'm going to say that he's no longer a child, and that because he's been raised, then he doesn't need to come and stay the night anymore. And that if DH wants to see his son, they can meet for a drink like 2 adults
I'm not sure the day of the 18th birthday is a magical day where everything changes. Some at 18 have a few months to a year left of high school. Others are off to college and may stay during a break. I think staying usually tapers off and dies a natural death in most situations.
Right - it seems odd that if he's still a high school senior, he'd be considered "raised". I can see that after he graduates high school, the plan for where he lives might need to be discussed.
I don't know why people think 18 is magical - many 18-year-olds these days seem more like 15-year-olds.
How does he view the visits in the future? Btw, adults do lots of things to share time together. Will you at some point begrudge your husband time away from your home to visit his adult son?
Since your SS has disabilities and learning difficulties, I don't see your DH just "meeting him for a drink" as his only contact with his son. While this young man sounds like he has caused you plenty of problems over the years, his Dad is probably going to continue to attempt to parent him and your DH may want him to continue over-night visits. Have you discussed this at all with your DH?
So SS is 17 and your DH and yourself haven't had ANY conversations about what his plans are after HS? Does he plan on living with BM? Does he plan on working and getting his own place? Does he plan on community college? This is something I would have been discussing with DH for SEVERAL years now... not just assuming SS is leaving at 17. Especially with the number of kids that "don't launch" on this discussion board.
In TX, the standard possession order ends at 18yo or when the child graduates from high school....
My SS18 just had his 18th bday a week or two ago and isnt enrolled in school and I have clearly stated to my husband that now court ordered visitation is over and in the future any house visits would require a phone call beforehand and there is no need for him to stay overnight as he has a car and needs to focus on finding a job
His mother kicked him out to live with his uncle on the day of his 18th bday (child support ends so no interest to keep him around) so now he wishes to stay over but i told my husband we have no room because court ordered visits with the younger kids come first
My husband is trying to move us in a bigger home....try to guess why
But to answer you, court ordered standard visitation ends at 18yo and you are absolutely correct to tell your husband that. He may or may not accept it tho....you know these single dads love doing wtv they want when it comes to their kids....the kids run the show basically
What do you mean, "see to it
What do you mean, "see to it that it stops"? Legally, he's not a minor at 18 anymore (in the U.S.) but don't you need your DH's agreement for the time at your house to stop?
I mean that when SS turns 18,
I mean that when SS turns 18, I'm going to say that he's no longer a child, and that because he's been raised, then he doesn't need to come and stay the night anymore. And that if DH wants to see his son, they can meet for a drink like 2 adults
"And that if DH wants to see
"And that if DH wants to see his son, they can meet for a drink like 2 adults"
I could be wrong but I think the drinking age is 21 most places so there drink thing probably will not work.
I'm not sure the day of the
I'm not sure the day of the 18th birthday is a magical day where everything changes. Some at 18 have a few months to a year left of high school. Others are off to college and may stay during a break. I think staying usually tapers off and dies a natural death in most situations.
Right - it seems odd that if
Right - it seems odd that if he's still a high school senior, he'd be considered "raised". I can see that after he graduates high school, the plan for where he lives might need to be discussed.
I don't know why people think 18 is magical - many 18-year-olds these days seem more like 15-year-olds.
Have u discussed this with your spouse
How does he view the visits in the future? Btw, adults do lots of things to share time together. Will you at some point begrudge your husband time away from your home to visit his adult son?
Since your SS has disabilities and learning difficulties,
Since your SS has disabilities and learning difficulties, I don't see your DH just "meeting him for a drink" as his only contact with his son. While this young man sounds like he has caused you plenty of problems over the years, his Dad is probably going to continue to attempt to parent him and your DH may want him to continue over-night visits. Have you discussed this at all with your DH?
CO's are usually in place
CO's are usually in place until the SKid turns 18 or graduates HS. Whichever is the later.
So SS is 17 and your DH and
So SS is 17 and your DH and yourself haven't had ANY conversations about what his plans are after HS? Does he plan on living with BM? Does he plan on working and getting his own place? Does he plan on community college? This is something I would have been discussing with DH for SEVERAL years now... not just assuming SS is leaving at 17. Especially with the number of kids that "don't launch" on this discussion board.
In TX, the standard
In TX, the standard possession order ends at 18yo or when the child graduates from high school....
My SS18 just had his 18th bday a week or two ago and isnt enrolled in school and I have clearly stated to my husband that now court ordered visitation is over and in the future any house visits would require a phone call beforehand and there is no need for him to stay overnight as he has a car and needs to focus on finding a job
His mother kicked him out to live with his uncle on the day of his 18th bday (child support ends so no interest to keep him around) so now he wishes to stay over but i told my husband we have no room because court ordered visits with the younger kids come first
My husband is trying to move us in a bigger home....try to guess why
But to answer you, court ordered standard visitation ends at 18yo and you are absolutely correct to tell your husband that. He may or may not accept it tho....you know these single dads love doing wtv they want when it comes to their kids....the kids run the show basically